Setup to be independent
My entire childhood I was prepped to “take care of myself”. Now as an adult, I have split emotions on this concept. I love that I truly can take care of myself and my family…always. I never get a freebie or a handout. I watch around me though and see people abuse food stamps and receive more handouts than I can fully comprehend. I’ve researched the funded programs extensively and they aren’t designed to get people out of them. It’s beginning to feel like people are rewarded when they need help and not when they succeed. I even see it in family dynamics….3 siblings, 1 doing well and never gets help in any way, #2 sibling-moves far away and lives their own life not interacting with family and sibling #3- relies on government assistance, family gifting money and so forth…I mean I get it to some degree but it’s so frustrating working so incredibly hard and never getting any relief or help. I once told my grandmother this and she said, they know but I don’t need the help and others do. Well duh! I worked my ass off to ensure I could support my family. The ones they help chose not to do that so they consistently need support and funds. Just sucks, that’s all.
I completely understand. It is frustrating when people say “I know you are strong enough to do this on your own.” I would like some company on this journey. If that makes sense.
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Others have their reasons for what they do, which might not at all coincide with ours. It’s important not to judge, as I keep reminding myself. Remember, you might not always be able to support yourself. I worked very hard also but never had a family to support. But if I had needed help for whatever reasons to obtain the necessities of life, I would have sought it.
Have you raised your kids alone?
@oswego no, I am married so we raise our children together however if I wasn’t Married I could still support my children independently-those we’re all things I considered before having kids. I don’t judge others because I’ve been through more in my lifetime than most encounter in 80 years but for instance I had a relative recently complain to me that she’s tired of people not treating her like an adult (she’s 23) but all I could think was….we’ll, you’re 23, your mother pays for your kids clothes, health/dental bills, takes them every other week for you because you say it’s too much, your dad bought your car, you work part time, etc you get the idea. If she wants to be treated like an adult, then be an adult-but I could never openly say that so I simply listen to her. Life just seems to reward those who don’t earn it and those I see working so dang hard always seem to get crapped on or have no relief. Life isn’t for the weak lol
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