Anxiety 2

I’m going to assume that this came from the same source as the information in my last entry, but I’m not sure since there’s no source listed on the print out.

Ten Ways to Untwist Your Thinking

1) Identify the Distortion.  Write down your negative thoughts so you can see which of the ten cognitive distortions you’re involved in.  This will make it easier to think about the problem in a more positive and realistic way.

2) Examine the Evidence.  Instead of assuming that your negative thought is true, examine the actual evidence for it.  For example, if you feel that you never do anything right, you could list several things you have done successfully.

3) The Double-Standard Method.  Instead of putting yourself down in a harsh, condemning way, talk to yourself in the same compassionate way you would talk to a friend with a similar problem.

4) The Experimental Technique.  Do an experiment to test the validity of your negative thought.  For example, if, during an episode of panic, you become terrified that you’re about to die of a heart attack, you could jog or run up and down several flights of stairs.  This will prove that your heart is healthy and strong.

5) Thinking in Shades of Gray.  Although this method may sound drab, the effects can be illuminating.  Instead of thinking about your problems in all-or-nothing extremes, evaluate things on a range from 0 to 100.  When things don’t work out as well as you hoped, think about the experience as a partial success rather than a complete failure.  See what you can learn from the situation.

6) The Survey Method.  Ask people questions to find out if your thoughts and attitudes are realistic.  For example, if you believe that public speaking anxiety is abnormal and shameful, ask several friends if they ever felt nervous before they gave a talk.

7) Define Terms.  When you label yourself "inferior" or "a fool" or "a loser" ask, "What is the definition of a fool?"  You will feel better when you see that there is no such thing as a fool or a loser.

8) The Semantic Method.  Simply substitute language that is less colorful and emotionally loaded.  This method is helpful for "should statements."  Instead of telling yourself "I shouldn’t have made that mistake," you can say, " "It would have been better if I hadn’t made that mistake."

9) Re-attribution.  Instead of automatically assuming that you are "bad" and blaming yourself entirely for a problem, think about the many factors that may have contributed to it.  Focus on solving the problem instead of using up all of your energy blaming yourself and feeling guilty.

10) Cost Benefit Analysis.  List the advantages and disadvantages of a feeling (like getting angry when your plane is late), a negative thought (like "No matter how hard I try, I always screw up") or a behavior pattern (like overeating and lying around in bed when you’re depressed).  You can also use the COst-Benefit Analysis to modify a self-defeating belief such as "I must always try to be perfect."

Something that we did in class that really helped me was keeping a record of negative thoughts and emotions.  Basically, you write down the thought/emotion (word for word, not a summary) that caused your anxiety.  

In my case, I wrote down the emotion associated with that thought as well.  For example, my sister’s family and I went in on some Packer’s tickets for my dad and a friend of his for my dad’s 50 birthday.  They weren’t cheap, but it was worth it.  One of my negative thoughts was "What if the tickets don’t work?"  When I wrote that down in my ‘journal’, I wrote:
Oct 3, 2010 – Anxious
"What if the tickets don’t work?"
Another one I had was:
Sept 30, 2010 – Angry
"Why doesn’t she take that screaming brat outside?"
Once we’d all gotten used to keeping that record, we started working with it.  We made charts with three sections: Automatic thought, Cognative Distortion and Coping Thoughts.  Basically, you take that negative thought, identify the distortion and then come up with a more accurate coping thought.  One of my own examples is:

Automatic Thought

They’re going to deny my application.
We’ll lose $700.
I’ll fail the tests.
I’ll be deported.
 

Cognative Distortion

Emotional reasoning
Mental Filter
Fortune Telling
All or Nothing
 

Coping Thoughts

I can’t be deported if I haven’t done anything wrong.
I’ve known the test answers since 5th grade
There’s no reason to deny my application.

At first, it seemed like a pain in the ass to do all of that just for some anxiety, but then I started doing it automatically without writing it down and -that- helped a lot.  This one particular coping mechanism is pretty much what’s keeping me from dissolving into a huge pile of panic while I’m off of my meds.

Another very helpful thing (and, sadly, this won’t be an option for everyone)…my group was entirely women.  We all got on very well.  So well, in fact, that we started a private Facebook group for ourselves that we use to support each other and share news.  We also meet about once a month to have lunch and chat about our lives, our anxieties and our successes.