i’m nothing

My boyfriend has a girlfriend
someone else other then me
and i cant let go
of someone i’m crazy in love with
he doesnt want to let go of me
but he’s wrapping his arms
tighter around her
yet i’m the kisses he is denying her
when did my heart become
a playground for their fun
at what point did i loose my mind
and stick by his side, no matter
I’m a secret and they are a couple
how could you
why am i torturing myself
with your love, with hope
i cant stop crying
and i want nothing more then
to ripe my viens
but i told u i wouldnt
so i drink instead
but nothing takes the pain away
i’m afraid i’ll die if i’m alone
no one to bandage my wounds
bleed freely, untamed
please dont go
she isnt right for you
you fight and yell with her
you use her name
to get me to do what you want
and i see but love too much 
and cherish everything
i should let go
but your happy with me
what have i become
i’m so fucking stupid
you want her and me
and i’m telling you its okay
ill stand by and watch you fall
and you have the nerve to get mad
at me when i’m jealous of her
she has everything
I’m nothing compared
I’m nothing