after the chaos….
helloooo.
it feels so nice to have the chaos of luke’s party behind me. right now all i feel is…settled. because nothing pressing is on the immediate horizon. we still have to throw a party for matt’s side on the 30th, but it’s at matt’s mom’s and there’s no kids. meaning, i don’t have to plan any games or themes, or do any cleaning….so i just have to supply the dollar store necessities and food…..and show up with the birthday boy. it seems so easy that i’m not stressing in the least.
luke’s party was really great. everything went well.
i’ll post more about it later on.
for now i kind of wanted to babble about the future.
since….i finally feel lots better. 2010 started out with such….crapness, with all of us being sick and stressed and behind on just about everything it seemed! i never had a second to even sit back and daydream about what’s to come, let alone look into it! so much happened for us in 2009, and i don’t even think i’ve been able to fully adjust to the fact that we LIVE here in buffalo now (!!!) since the holiday chaos started literally days after we arrived. it has been non-stop planning for halloween, thanksgiving, christmas, luke’s birthday….my mind has always been on SOMETHING, and i’ve always been busy putting this and that together. it feels so relaxing having it behind us for a little while.
so. 2010. let’s get down to business finally, hmm?
in the very short term, little adjustment type dealys, i’ve made two decisions. a) i need a haircut – one with an actual style so that when i only have 5 minutes to do something with it, it doesn’t look like a stringy mess just clinging to my head. b) i need to start working out. which is just…..kind of a crazy idea i’m still wrapping my mind around.
you see…i hate exercise. i hate it with a passion. i feel like…..it’s a waste of time. it’s boring. it makes you smelly and need another shower. and i could never stay interested in it long enough to = weight loss. but now, i don’t really have anything i want to lose. i’m hovering right around 123-124 which is actually a couple pounds less than my original goal weight despite me eating like a cow for the past month and a half. i think this is only due to the fact that i carry a 24 pound baby toddler around daily, and all the extra calories to stay alive during the sickness from hell. so…working out can actually be for things like……health. and toning. and not an insane "OMG WHY ISN’T THIS MAKING ME LOSE 10 POUNDS IN ONE DAY" frame of mind, since i feel like the reward should be huge like that due to the energy required.
i’m not really sure what i want to do or how i want to do it. but i’ll tell you what sold me, at least. my aunt jennie came over to help me get ready for the party yesterday (and she seriously saved my butt, it was amazing the help she gave me!). we were talking about working out and she has really seriously stuck to it for over a year so i asked her exactly what she did in my curiousity to see how people actually do stuff like that! not only did she say it was strength-training based (which is TOTALLY what i wanted to hear since it’s the cardio that makes me want to just, die. not that i won’t do any….just that i won’t do a ton). she listed all the ways she has felt better since working out and i just kept thinking OMG I WANT THAT. particularly the energy. i neeeed to be able to keep up with luke.
plus. this baby belly? really freaking sick of having it. i know it will never be perfect.….but hell, i’d deal with a little shelfy-bump. i want to not look pregnant after every time i eat a cracker! is that so much to ask????
so i asked matt what he could do to help me and he got really excited about it. i knew he would. he’s been looking for the motivation to work out because…..well, i accidentally made him lose a lot of weight in my quest to lose mine so he’s been dying to beef back up the right way. so we’re going to write down our problem areas and some work outs and routines and we’re going to work out together at night after the baby is in bed. the crazy part of all this….my parents have the huge-ass boflex machine in their basement so why aren’t we using it?? hellooo. i’m really excited about this. if i can minimize the belly before bridesmaid dress time i’ll be a happy freaking girl.
in the biggest piece of our 2010 future, i’ve been thinking about houses.
i’ve been antsy to be back in our own space, but i haven’t really thought about houses (even though i HAVE searched for listings and such….). i guess i just never got too serious about any of it because i wasn’t sure how much matt wanted us to get saved and such before we could start. over the last couple days (he’s been finally stepping out of the 2010 fog along with me, since he’s finally better too) he’s been talking houses quite a bit. he mentioned this morning that as soon as we know the amount of our tax return (giving us a better idea of how much more we need to save) we should get a realtor. we know what we want in a house, we know how much we want to spend, and we know general areas we’d like to live in…..but we need someone to point out specific neighborhoods because we can’t quite seem to find "it" while searching ourselves.
we did find one house this morning that really excites me to think about. the only thing is, it’s pretty far north. it’s cambria, but shares a zip with lockport since cambria doesn’t have it’s own. and it’s really close to delphi. it’s on upper mountain road, it’s a ranch with lots of windows and light and hardwood floors. it’s in the starpoint school district, which i like…it was one of my favs to do field work in. it sits on 1/2 an acre, overlooking more and more acres with a little shed-barn in the back. the kitchen is a really nice size and the basement is finished and beautifully so – matt absolutely loves it. the only problem is….it’s only 3 bedrooms….which isn’t a HUGE deal because they are decently sized so there’s enough room for 1-2 more kids before getting super cramped. but i really REALLY wanted a craft space and there are other houses in our price range with another room that i could totally use. it just seems like kind of a drive from most of our family, and from a lot of places we usually like to go. plus….we’re not exactly ready. and being as gorgeous as it is, it will probably be gone before we are.
i’ve really been daydreaming about what it will be like and getting a picture of what i really want. i just….hope it’s out there!
back to the present…
matt has two sets of plans today. first he’s going to my dad’s to bottle the beer he brewed with him & tom a few weeks ago, and then to his brother’s house to fix their wireless router and then play video games. he invited me to both to visit with the other people present who won’t be doing those things but………….YAWN. i mean seriously, does any of that sound fun? it’s not even that really, though. yesterday (and the day before, and the day before, and the day before…..) were SO busy and chaotic i kind of want to just take it easy! i have my own plans to get done….and i suppose i could do them while i’m bored this week? but i just don’t
feel like doing anything today.
i am, however, about to take a walk when luke wakes up (he’s starting to stir now).
i know, crazy….in buffalo? in january? well…..it’s 31 out. that’s kind of sweltering for these parts. 🙂
just kidding. but matt’s crazy and likes to bundle up luke and take him for walks and crazy luke loves it, despite the cold. matt’s urging me to go along so i’m going to humor him with this since i shot him down for the plans for later today.
my hope for today is to…..fill the toy box luke got with all the presents he got!
wash his laundry, including the clothes he got yesterday that will fit him now.
clean up the chaos from yesterday. and…meal plan. if i get all that done, i’ll be pleased.
i’ll shut up now 🙂