A Breath Of Fresh Air…..

I got a phone call last night.  It came at 11 pm, the same time the other phone calls have started on both occasions.  I grabbed my little hand held recorder, hit record and answered the phone.  On the other end of the line I heard *his* sweet voice.  A much needed sound my ears craved badly.  Before I knew it, nearly an hour had passed and I actually found myself fighting myself about saying "I love you" as I hung up the phone.  Not really an "I love you, want to spend the rest of my life with you, no one compares to you" kinda way.  Just an "I love you, you’ve really made me feel much better and I thank God I met you" kinda thing.

Incase you havent figured it out yet, I’m speaking of my friend from Buffalo.  I sooooo cant wait until my trip up there this summer.  I needed that conversation so bad.  For nearly an hour, nothing in my life was wrong, the smile on my face was huge and continuos and my thoughts were all pleasent thoughts.  There was no such thing as Joseph, or anything else for that matter.  It was just he and I, our conversation, and that’s all that mattered to me.

I’m totaly infatuated with this guy.  I admit, I have a HUGE crush.  I wonder if the crush will fade after we meet?  I dont see it as being possible, but anything is possible.  Im trying not to get my hopes up about it, because frankly, there are things that stand in the way.  I will admit though, that my heart will hurt some if this is as far as we ever make it.

Anyways…….that’s all I really have to say about this phone conversation.