Actually writing something

I hate how I’ve been so random lately but honestly I have not much to write about. Same ole same ole. Work, Church, and Little league sports. If I veer off of those topics my posts tend to turn into rants and who wants to hear someone crying and whining all the time lol.

My boss flew in from Belgium this week and worked with me and we all went through a series of meetings about budget,  direction,  projects yanno all the usual politics and annual reveiw stuff. Got alot accomplished this week…… I think lol. So she left yesterday to go back home and today I am so not motivated to work lol. I was actually really nervous about her coming and meeting with me I didn’t think I would have a job following the server crash which BTW was NOT my fault in the least but they some how managed to put me in the middle of it,  but it turned out pretty good.

On the home front all is well Kids are doing excellent in school little Quincy is way above average in his classes and has to take alot of advanced classes and he is doing well in them. Lexy is doing great except for in math. She has always always had alot of problems with math so I’ve been basically tutoring her at home and really working with her but sometimes she just can’t grasp the concepts. Like she’ll learn something get it down then like 5 minutes later completely forgets what she’s learned. I’ve had her write it down and refer to it but they want the kids to learn really fast in school so they don’t wait on her to complete her study methods so we’re working on it but I may need to get  her a tutor. I hate how they are now measuring the kids success at learning to the OAT tests instead of individually focusing on the kids strong and weak points but thats a whole nother post lol

I’m still gaining weight. I went from a size 16 in clothes to a 22 now tell me that ain’t a huge change and I’ll look at you like your 14 karat crazy. I hate hypothyroid. I’ve been complaining to Quincy about this for the longest and he just couldn’t see the weight gain being drastic until a couple of days ago when I had on a particular outfit. He was like man I had to pray to God like, " okay how can I tell her it’s getting out of control without hurting her feelings Lord,  okay we gotta get you to the gym and whatever you need to do we will make changes in our schedules to get you there and focused on your weightloss,  I’ll do whatever I have to do to help". I’m like DUHHHH I been trying to tell you this all along this weight gain is really killing me. I have a closet full of size 16 dress pants and Khaki’s and jeans that I cannot fit. Oh and guess what mrs wonderful (yours truly) did at the laundromet?!?! Washed so many loads of clothes and then mistakenly LEFT a whole triple load of clothes at the laundromat to disappear in the abyss of people stealing. i mean there were sheets,  in there kids clothing and get this….. ALL OF MY CLOTHES THAT I HAD TO GO OUT AND PURCHASE DUE TO THE WEIGHT GAIN. So I have NOTHING I  can fit. NOTHING. Even down to underwear that I have I cannot fit anything. My granny panties are even getting tight. WTHeck! I’m 30 lbs away from my original weight and yanno it’s nice to say well it’s only a little bit of weight but yanno what it’s not just a little weight gain. This isn’t a 5-15 lb weight gain it’s a 50 lb weightgain. I feel like I’ll be back at the starting blocks again and when I look at it I sometimes feel like " do I really have the energy to tackle this all over again like I did. Will I really be able to do this for the rest of my life? Why can’;t this be easy’?  I was emabarassed for my boss to fly back in from belgium and see me 50 lbs heavier than when she left but I didn’t feel too bad because she has had a significant gain too. I know thats bad but that is really how I felt. Liek well she can’t say anything she’s gained too. I dunno I really need to get past this but I don’t know how. I’m asking God for guidance in all of this because it really is affecting me in everything I do. I’m less bubbly and active and I was known for being the silly always jumping around  sistah.

See this is why I refrain from writing I hate bring clouds into people’s wonderful fridays. I need to get out of here so I think I’ll go to the bank for lunch. And the saga begins…….

~He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.~

Proverbs 25:28

‘I grew up penecostal and I now attend an apostolic church, but I have long ago taken off the denominational boundaries. I’m sick of religion and tradition. I’m more concerned about relationship with God through Jesus Christ.’

~me