1 is the loneliest number 3 white hearts

Auntie wasn’t feeling good this morning so I went walking by myself. It was cool. Still raining but I was well equipped.

Work is busy and hectic as usual but meh……

Life seems to be trotting right on along. Cheerleading competition has passed and the football season is almost over so I look forward to being able to come home and sit still for a moment lol. Although I fear my pastor is just itching to throw me into some childrens programs this winter season I’m really not on all that. And I had a meeting with him back in June being asked to be taken off of the childrens ministry because I only got pulled into it to fill some spaces and childrens ministry is just not my area to flow in. He kindly brushed me off but said he would cut back and see if they can find someone to fill my spot. I was only asked to please atleast participate in the JBQ tournaments so I agreed. I’m not taking on any programs this year. I know he’ll be a little upset and try to talk me into it but I’m not budging I can’t do it. I’ve got wayyy too much on my plate as I explained to him back in June. I love the kiddies but I don’t love that ministry at all.

Right now I need to be hitting this cd project hard. Our myspace will be up soon with details of shows and booking and our photoshots for the cd and debut concert. RIght now we need to focus on going into the studio and getting all of our legal paperwork completed. I need to get my copywrite stuff sent off by next week and another member is taking care of getting our name registered with the state of Ohio as well as purchasing a UPC for the cd.

Man this singing stuff is work lol. But I do see God renewing my youthful passion for music. As a teen and even as a child I always wanted to be a singer. I remember every year on my birthday when asked to blow out the candles on my cake to make a wish I always wished to be a singer when I grow up. I’ve been doing that since I was 5 years old. But somewhere along the road as a teenager I was in a group and we went through some stuff just tryng to establish a group and stay with a decent manager and not get put in hole in the wall clubs to sing. Long story short my dreams of being a singer were cut short by burn out and by greedy smiling in your face, hand in the pocket crooks.

By the time I started going ot church my dreams of being a singer were long long gone that wasn’t even on the agenda. I mean I knew i could sing but that was about it lol. Well it’s amazing how God can bring things to your remembrance. When I joined church I was asked to be on the praise and worship team both with my old church and my now 4 years attended church. I’m like whatever no biggie… I love to worship God in song and life,  I can sing yeah I can do it. But when talk of a cd from my praise and worship leader came forth at first I didn’t even want it. I kept thinking about how crazy my schedule already is, having kids and being on the road,  fulfilling my wifely duties,  Just thinking of all the cons. But when I would go down in prayer God would remind me of that wish I made on my brithdays all those years. for 17 years I wished on every birthday to be a singer when i grow up lol. Now that the opportunity presents itself I was thinking of every excuse I could. Bishops and prophets would visit our church and they’d prophecy to the praise and worship team that God is about to cause and explosion in our ministry and this praise team is going to have a cd out that will edify the kingdom of God. So I’m thinking wow you really see all that? lol still bucking the idea though. But over the past 3 months my wall of unbelief has been cracking and even as I listen to music now I can hear the different instruments and arrangement and the bassline vs. the melody which is amazing to me. See I have an ear for harmony and voices but never before have I really given much attention to instruments or the melody or the music period for that matter but now I can see it! It’s like my eyes have been opened. When I hear music I can close my eyes and I feel like I’m in a disney’s fantastia movie. Like the notes come to life if you get what I’m saying.

Okay so I just went off on another tangent about randomnesslessness but you know me. Gotta keep the conversation going know what I mean? Okay talk to you guys later. 

~He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.~

Proverbs 25:28

‘I grew up penecostal and I now attend an apostolic church, but I have long ago taken off the denominational boundaries. I’m sick of religion and tradition. I’m more concerned about relationship with God through Jesus Christ.’

~me