True Love and Bodycounts.

Cupid, yes THAT Cupid sits in the back of Frank Scali’s place with his two huge bodygaurds standing right beside his table. He stuffs pasta into his cutesy wootsy little face so fast and furious that it is a miracle none of it spills out and onto his Armani or Trixie Boombata the sleek and sinewy vamp vixen fem fatale who sits next to him. In his mind he goes over all the angles one more time. Tomarrow he will fly around a little bit shooting a few yuppies with his heart shaped bow and then the under the table payments from Hallmark, as well as the floral and chocolate industries will come poring in. He will take the profits and buy a house in the Hamptons and a different hooker every single night. An evil grin spreads over his pasta covered face as he says softly, “Love, what a great hustle”. Suddenly the air is filled with thunder and the smell of burning gunpowder as his two bodygaurds drop from headshots. Cupid reaches under his jacket but he finds that Trixie Boombata is holding his hands so he can’t get to his piece. Then Tony Rocco Mofo steps out of the shadows and points his Kimber .45 right at Cupids forehead. The last voice Cupid hears before a bullet tears through his brain is Trixie’s as she whispers to him, “True love always comes with a bodycount babycakes”. Tony Rocco and his soulmate walk out into the night leaving Cupid face down in a plate of Linguini.

Scali’s Ristorante (614) 759-7764 Call for reservations and try the Linguini…It’s to die for.