todays rambling

today felt like a good day, i got alot of studying done which is nice, however i am so tired of studying and i am also picking up on monday and i get to work with one of my favorite coworkers so thats exciting, i hope shes still cool with me i have no idea if the ex bff talked to her or not about what happened, theyre cousins but its not like it really matters, i need the hours and i got a nurse to stop by and put the hours in for me which was super dope, im keeping up with my journal entries and im proud of myself for that as well. uhm i know what i should do , i should work in my dbt therapy workbook, i do have some downtime but i think i might also like to walk around the house a bit to try and get in more steps, i want to continue to lose weight and well, i feel im doing a pretty piss poor job of it, since i am eating out all the time, but i will get some groceries since we have none, oh yeah i also took my roommate to the airport today, shes gonna be in texas for the next week, i bet the cats at home are losing their mind since shes not there and shes literally always home so theyre probably going to have a meltdown for the next week. but eh whatever. im not going to have a day off for over a week but then i will have the weekend off. but im not going to have much to do with my life and as far as i know, the bf is going to be staying with me for the week that my roommate is gone and im not entirely sure how i feel about that but it will be nice to see how we hangout together for extended periods of time. i need to develop a new friend group. i feel like i have no close friends anymore since i lost my ex bff and its a bit depressing, i cant tell if im happier for it or not. i spent the entire evening before work deep cleaning the house since its so gross. my roommate isnt the cleanest but its fine, i want to keep up on the buddhist stuff but i dont think i want to read it tonight. im not sure if im avoiding it or not, im not sure if im depressed, i really dont know how im feeling but i really would like to keep losing weight so  i need to get back to a regular schedule, i wonder if i could get the roommate to just go with me to the gym in the morning, id really enjoy just going after work again. that really would work better for me so i can get the sleep i need anyway but i also donate and that interferes with me donating so its probably best to keep it in the evening, i think the best course of action for me and my schedule is going to sleep no later than 7 on tuesday wednesday and thursday, waking up at 3, and then on monday and friday, going to sleep no later than 8 , waking up no later than 4. i think this is a good plan, the weekends are alittle wonky but thats okay. i just want to get back to the gym, i really enjoyed it. okey byeee