Molecular Structure.

I went out for my birthday on Friday and ended up getting spiked. The last thing I remember from the night was suddenly losing control of my body and mind, everything started spinning and I just let it, there was nothing I could do to stop it. I remember wanting so badly to be home, in my bed and safe. The next morning I woke up scared, I didn’t know where I was and how I got there, my memories were distorted and I felt this deep sadness and disconnect from myself. Luckily I was safe and with a friend but the thoughts of what could have been of me if my friends weren’t there made me throw up.

Saturday was a blur, I spent it in bed unable to string a coherent sentence and just staring into the nothingness of my room. I could not eat, speak, sleep, laugh, cry, or anything. I just sat still, staring at the wall. My body felt strange and my mind frazzled. I just sat there for 9 fucking hours staring into space. Then I showered and went back to bed/

It is Sunday and I still do not fell like myself, I had lunch with a friend, plans that I so desperately wanted to cancel but never got round to doing. Lunch was nice but I was in no state of mind to be around others, I could not hold a conversation and we mostly just ate in silence, exchanging a few awkward laughs and forced pleasantries. I am in bed now wondering how I am supposed to go to work and resume on with my life as normal.