Jinxed myself big time.

So…I totally jinxed myself with that last entry.  He’s totally perfect….yes at being an immature, cowardly, asshole lol.  I’m able to laugh about it now because he’s so not worth being all bummed about.  I’m not even sure what happened.  He just kinda quit talkin…and textin…and wouldn’t tell me what his problem was.  I just flat out asked him if I was wasting my time and he wouldn’t answer.  I finally just told him he was being cowardly and immature and should just tell a person to go to hell if that’s how he feels.  He shot back with a low blow about me being a single mom that only bitches about my ex and blah blah.  It hurt…it hurt bad.  It wouldn’t matter if he said it or some stranger..it was a low blow and it hurt.  He took a sore subject and rubbed it in majorly.  I asked him what I’d ever done to deserve that and…he somewhat explained his reasons for saying that…there’s no excuse..but the whole thing about my ex..I was only talking to him as a friend..how was I suppose to know he hated me complaining about him.  I never once complained to him about him as an ex…more of a dad…but whatever.  He finally lightened up a little, but….still no excuse.  I dunno if I mentioned or not how he gave me $200 a while back.  Well after he made that comment to me I wanted nothing but to be able to give that back to him.  He gave it to me..against me wanting to really accept it..but he left it at my grandma’s…and it really did help me out a ton.  He said I could just pay him back whenever.  Well, I mentioned wanting to get it back to him and he said he’d set something up with his cousin so I could give it to him and he’d get it to him.  I wasn’t able to come up with it and the next night he wanted to know where to have his cousin meet me.  I explained to him that I wasn’t able to come up with it all and really didn’t have much.  He got all pissy and what not again and I finally just told him that the more I thought about it he’d get his money when he could treat me like a human being…that I hadn’t done shit to him and I wasn’t going to stress over him having a bad day and treating people like shit.  He came back by threatening that I didn’t want to play that game with him that my tires and rims on my car would equal $200 easily.  I literally laughed at him and told him he’d be doing me a favor.  My whole car isn’t even worth that..let alone the tires and rims that are shot!  Plus how stupid is it to threaten someone through text message..if it would have happened…I would have had the proof lol.  I did get a little concerned about my horse though because he knows where my horse is..knows there’s no one ever there…and…how much she means to me.  And I have no clue what he is capable of anymore.  Last week was it for me…he’d shown me a side of him that..I really honestly NEVER thought he had in him…but..that’s all it took.  I asked him what the hell his problem was and he said it has nothing to do with me…that he just needed the money and he was pissed off about what was going on over there..meaning in WY.  He never would tell me what was going on, all he’d tell me was that something was going on with his family..something about his brother in law was in the hospital…and that’s it.  I told him that I might understand a little better if he’d let me know what the hell was going on, and that was it.  I haven’t heard from him and I haven’t tried talking to him and that was….Friday night….

I was really feeling down about the whole thing at first.  Mostly because I felt like an idiot because I’d bragged about how perfect and amazing he was and…my judgement is horrible obviously lol.  I mean I’m still shocked because he NEVER hinted in any way shape or form that he was capable of acting this way.  He’s a totally different person..and that’s what makes it easier.  I don’t want someone like him near my son….and for what it’s worth..I feel I deserve SOOOO much better than that….so..that’s the end of that story lol. 

Anyways..on a slightly better note…lol totally better note…Brandy heard all about this crap and decided I needed to go on a blind date with her, her boyfriend and one of his friends.  I was totally against it at first because I was a total man hater.  I finally agreed to it on Friday or sometime and the plan was to wait a week because she had stuff going on and I had to work all weekend.  Well Saturday night she starts texting me telling me that this guy is excited to meet me the next night..I was half asleep so I didn’t think much of it…and Sunday morning and asked her if she texted me and she said yes that he was excited to meet me that night…and Iw as like huh..did I agree to something I forgot about and she’s like no we just decided for you lol.  So to make a long story short, we went to the movies to see A Golden Compass.  Cute movie by the way.  Anyways…come to find out I know the guy.  I felt dumb because I didn’t remember but I had a class with him in highschool and he dated one of my friends.  He’s definitely grown up lmfao.  Anyways.  He told Brandy I was just as hot now as I was in highschool lol….he ended up telling me the same thing.  I had a blast though.  I didn’t stay out too long because my sister had Mason and it was a school night, but I gave him my number and told him to call..which he started texting before I ever got out of the driveway lol.  We’ve been talking a lot since, and we’ll probably do something tomorrow night because I don’t have to work Thursday and he doesn’t have to work until late, so yeah.  He’s a way nice guy…so we’ll see what happens..no reason to rush things…I’m all for just hangin out and seeing what happens and he is to…so we’ll see. 

Anyways…that’s my story..and I haven’t updated for a while because I wanted that situation to settle lol.  I just need to keep my attitude that I DO NOT need a man to make me happy…I have my son..and that’s enough lol…and if one comes along that’s worth the time…and the effort..we’ll see what happens….is that bad?