Recommitted?

So, I am thinking about recommitting myself to counting calories… part of the problem is that I eat on the go a lot, so I eat a lot of drive thru or gas station pick up, beef jerky, bugles, chips, burritos, slice of pizza, bagel, fries, chicken strips, whatever.

For those of you who have been around for a while, you may remember that I counted calories for about 6 months when I was living in Petersburg and not doing much of anything (except, you know, going to school online FT and working as a substitute and raising Kasin, who was about 2.) and keeping house and playing Betty HomeMaker…. anyhow, I had a lot of free time then, so I could do pilates once a day for 30 minutes or so, and Kasin and I also walked to the swimming pool pretty much every day and went swimming for a couple of hours each day, including walking to and from the pool which totalled about three miles per trip, as well. It was such a small place, we walked everywhere… lots of exercise, and the weather was pretty fair/warm, so we were outside ALL the time.

Now a days, I’m stuck in frigid Fairbanks and I live in my car, mostly.. it’s hard to keep up with my schedule, I’m always busy and I’m never in one place for very long. So, it’s hard to plan around all of that and commit to eating healthily, and it’s also a lot cheaper to eat crap than to eat good food.

ANYWAYS, I think I’m going to start packing lunches and counting calories at dinner, keeping a notebook for food goals and such. The last time I went to my OB/GYN for a yearly check up/exam, she told me that I need to really start watching my weight, as I’ve gained about 60 pounds in the last two years, and if that keeps up, I’m going to be in trouble. To be honest, I’m ALREADY in trouble, because I’m completely uncomfortable in my own body, I can’t do things I used to be able to, bend/reach/get comfortable, and my back is definitely not benefitting from the additional weight. I also HATE photos of myself and just really have been feeling poorly about myself in general. Part of that is my own fault, as I need to just accept my flaws/body/self and love me for me, but part of it is that I know I’m out of shape and it’s only getting worse, and I’m not happy with how it’s progressing. I’ve gained so much weight since Milo was born.

And it’s a shame, too, because after I had him, I was a good 30 pounds lighter than before I got pregnant with him… so I had a head start on getting in shape/staying in shape. Argh. I’m just really disappointed in myself for letting it get this out of control. When I was at my OB/GYN check, I was like 216 pounds. I’ve never weighed 200 or more pounds in my life, until now. I have been avoiding my scale since I started gaining weight back after having Milo… I was so happy to be able to eat again, after having severe hyperemesis for the entire nine months of my pregnancy and not being able to eat or even drink anything, I sort of went overboard. Plus it’s cold and miserable in Alaska, and outside sucks.. and I’m poor, and busy, so having time to work out/go to the gym/etc is pretty impossible…

Anyways, I have a few work out DVDs and I might get a couple more that I can do during the week when I’m home alone before or between classes, and I’m going to try really hard to start counting calories and snacking smarter. It’ll take quite a bit of effort to get back on track, but I’m going to try. I logged back into Live Strong.com and The Daily Plate, just to get a feel for logging my calories again.. I can do that from my phone, too, I think.. I’m going to look for a calorie counter app on my phone later, so I can log calories on the go. The last time I did this, I lost about 20 pounds in 6 months, and I felt really good.

At this point, I can’t ever find anything that fits me, and I feel awful… clothes look awful on me, I can’t ever find anything flattering or comfortable, and I am sick of it. I need new clothes, but I don’t want to buy an entire size 16 wardrobe. I have a serious over eating problem, and even though I *KNOW* it, I can’t seem to stop my damn self most of the time.. so I really need to buckle down and get it under control.

So, here goes nothing. Wish me luck.

good luck! Ive bene doing intermittent fasting and calorie counting and lost 10 lbs in the first week, and ive kept it off for the last 4, but nothing since. But its better then where i was and i feel better for it. I use sparkpeople.com for calorie counting and really like it. my fitnesspal.com is good too and has a free app.

scrpbookr

February 10, 2013

Good Luck!

*American*Girl*

you should def get myfitnesspay app. A lot of OD people have it and we all keep track of one another 😉 my name is hollym1009 🙂

can you sign up for a cardio or fitness class through the school? that could be fun AND count towards your degree!

I could have totally written this! I am uncomfortable and unhappy with myself too, and need to change it. I know this is an excuse, but it is just such a pain in the ass to cook and eat healthy, haha. Really though, we are busy with work and school (you know the drill, you’re doing it too!) and all of the go-to meals that I typically cook aren’t the best for you. I suppose I could try and figure out a way to make them less yucky, and more healthy. But you are right — it is much easier and much cheaper to eat crap, rather than healthy stuff. But if I want it to change, I have to do it myself. Obviously no one is going to do it for me. 🙁

I count calories. I use The Fitness Pal app. It seriously does help. Ashley

RYN: we stopped nursing at the end of January.