shell

lately I have been sitting down at this desk hoping something will come out of me, but it doesn’t happen. Even now as thoughts are pooling in my head, I still can’t seem to write any of them down. Maybe I secretly don’t want to? Now there’s a thought.

This weekend was incredibly hard. Friday marked the one month anniversary, and yesterday was fathers day.

It is interesting to me, interesting for lack of a better word, that up until March, I had never lost anyone dear to me. now it seems like we are cursed.

I keep thinking my dad will come home before my birthday. That the door is going to swing open and I will hear "BRILEA!!!" Do you know that is has been since may 2nd that I have heard my dad’s voice?

Someday I will try to write out the events that took place those last 2 weeks at Mayo.

Every night I go to sleep forcing past memories into my mind so I will go to sleep thinking of the past, and hoping that when I wake up the past month would only be a dream.

I don’t know what else to say.