August 2020

I was so excited the day we flew down to Turkey. I just wasn’t sure if I was more excited to experience yet another country I’d never been to or to meet Emilie. I’d say the latter was the most likely. I was curious yet nervous. Remember, we were no longer friends and from what I could tell based on what Isabel told me, she wasn’t exactly eager to meet me.

We all met on a yacht owned by a couple. They were mutual friends of Isabel and Emilie that had recently retired from Germany to live on their boat which they sailed in various parts of the Mediterranean. They seemed very nice and I thanked them for letting me come along.

We arrived before Emilie did and the suspense was a killer even though I tried not to let it show. I also tried not to let myself feel so self-conscious, but I did. I wondered how she would judge my appearance from the sundress I wore to my hair to my body to my face. I knew it was silly and I told myself not to bother giving a shit about anyone that clearly didn’t give a shit about me, yet I couldn’t help how I felt.

I also wondered how she would treat me. Would she warm up to me and be pleasant since we were going to share the same 40-foot yacht for the next 10 days? I guessed she would be somewhere in between friendly and not so much as cold but quiet where I was concerned.

And I guessed wrong.

My shock and bewilderment over the way Emilie gave me such a cold shoulder was astonishing. I thought she would at least give me a polite “hello,” but instead I got nothing more than an occasional glare.

Just what in the world had I ever said to make her dislike me so much? I wasn’t even going to bother to try to win her over. She wasn’t worth it. If anything, I went from ignoring her in return to actually going out of my way to annoy her. I took subtle yet obvious digs at her while talking to others, spilled a drink on her accidentally on purpose, and other obnoxious things along the way as well.

“What the fuck is your problem?” she finally asked a few days into our vacation when she was able to catch me away from the others.

Before heading back to where the others sat gabbing with wine, I shrugged and said, “I don’t know, I guess now you have a valid reason to hate me, Emilie.”