Happily exploring physical appearances!

Of greatest importance, there is so much human psychology involved in perceptions and observations about physical appearances that it probably makes sense that the youngest post-pubescent among us typically struggle most with the subject.  (for their tending to know relatively less about the human mind)

Last night I went to a sporting event with a large crowd gathered and it was there that I was caused to pause and ponder sooooooooo many vibrantly attractive people around.  This was a scenario in which it never made sense to turn around and check-out somebody’s butt because I might then miss the approach of a captivating face from the other direction.

I can’t find the right emphatic words to stress that the single most significant element about physical appearances is other people!  I can’t imagine my life if, when becoming sexually intimate with a woman, I didn’t have cause to know  that her breasts were especially firm, or her legs were especially muscular.  In what other ways do men communicate the appeal to a woman’s beauty than those which aren’t relative to other women???

There were so many alluring appearances in attendance last night and a few linger in my mind today, such as two sisters, each very similar in height, each brunette, and each with faces which were so very similar.  It was through that sense of "all other things being equal" which allowed that their subtle differences could be best appreciated.  I wish there was a way to study whether people are perceived to be more attractive when they are with other people, than they seem to be when they are alone.  Mothers and daughters the same way…  sometimes so remarkable when together, and each seemingly likely to be perceived as more attractive then, than when alone.

The raw effects of human genetics are typically enjoyable beyond what most of us can summarize.  I sometimes find myself falling for the silly (or at least "incorrect") notion that a parent who is 3 degrees of a particular shade of ‘dark’ (skin color) and another parent who is 7 degrees of the same shade of ‘dark’, will have offspring who are 5 degrees of that shade of ‘dark’.  Tangent to how wrong and non-prevalent that is, is that the other people all around us are the central reason why our own best physical traits are deemed so exceptional.

Countless women all over the internet are complaining about the online porn use of men they are or are no longer mated with, and lost on so many of them is the deep human instinct to mate for life.  Unfortunately there are so many people in our society who, for reasons beyond their own control, have been adversely affected in ways that challenge them to ever be able to mate for life.  If I were someone who was blessed to sleep in the same bed with a woman each and every night, hitting the sack at 7:30pm and making love until we both grew tired… I’d still feel somehow shortchanged were I unable to understand  fully just how unique and sexy her body was.

I cannot fathom myself wanting anything to do with the world’s oldest profession in such a scenario, and yet I’d be a lesser person were I not simply aware of in what ways my mate’s appearance was so unique and special.  If you put a display of brown business suits in a major department store then the women who purchase them take on the look of the brown business suit while their apparent uniqueness takes a backseat.  Of course most of our bodies are mostly covered when out in public, so the degree of uniqueness is sure to be reduced.  No surprise, then, that a sporting event during summer would leave me impacted significantly as people dressed casually and comfortably suggests fewer clothes and more visible uniqueness.

If only there were a way to quantify the appeal to physical appearances from the vantage point of the human eye.  I get the strong sense that  there is a wide chasm between the stereotypical female perception that a guy would like to trade-up each time he saw bigger tits, a firmer ass, or a prettier smile, AND the way the human mind actually appreciates the vast realm of appearances. 

Some of those nights out in the red light district would have never ended had I had the notion to size-up first one woman, and then another, before looking to trade-up based merely on measurements I could perceive from a vehicle passing at 30mph.  I’d willingly admit that there was some comparison in the area of how coherent various working girls would tend to be late at night, because I always wanted to take home a woman who was mentally sharp and ‘with-it’.  Yet once I made the seeming ‘investment’ that was approaching the woman on foot and then inviting her back to my car, I was perfectly content to continue on the path toward further investment in the same woman vs. having any thought at all about measuring the tits standing on the next corner and then re-calculating my evening.  It just isn’t like that, and it is never like that.

Human psychology is tipped toward healthy human minds wanting and being willing to mate for life, and it is indicative of our internal flaws that we allow ourselves to lose confidence in that reality.  Now I’m not saying that if you were brutally abused as a youngster and it was left untreated, you can find yourself a wholesome good mate and allow yourself to be satisfied with their companionship for a lifetime.  It is in such a case the flaws introduced to you in the past which make your present and/or future so unbearable in that way.  It seems far too simple for me to sit here and write about fixing those flaws through therapy, when such an endeavor might be the single most challenging task you’ve ever undertaken.

I don’t pretend to know, either, how two or more such past victims ‘mesh’ romantically with one another, sometimes for all eternity.  That is to say that some such couples ‘fit’ in ways that I can’t identify from this vantage point.  Of course they know, or have a tolerance for elements of humanity the likes of which I’ve never been made to identify.

Amid all of the other appearance-related details I considered last evening, was confirming in my mind the idea that people of a certain echelon of human attractiveness do indeed tend to mate with others on their level.  When you see a stunning woman, you can expect something not too far off from her equal in the way of the man by her side.  I’m guessing that is the healthy norm, and that sometimes those who have been adversely affected by life-altering outside challenges or abuses might trend toward seemingly mis-matched relationships between one considerably physically attractive person and another notably less so.

During the height of summer the various physical traits which make humanity so remarkable tend to be on display, as are little samples of the p

ersonalities to which they are matched.  Sometimes the appearance tends to create the personality, as is the case with the majorly attractive people who are used to being approached and stared-at.  I sense that their partners are more used to others staring at their mates than is the case with less striking individuals.  Sometimes, too it seems as if the anticipated major ogling is a sought-after part of their preparation for a day spent out with a crowd.  Not only that, but they’re typically best at engaging others, and at making full and direct eye contact while so doing (because so many have wanted their attention over time, that they’ve trained themselves to interact).

My Open Diary faves over the years have represented a pleasing and remarkable array of mostly female appearances, and it is no bad thing that the general appeal to "diaries" tends to hit females at certain ages, and OD keeps refreshing itself with more and more young women from those age groups.

Here again, despite the random and newer appearances of more recent additions to this diary site, there is a whole lot to be said for investing oneself in certain people and then building and building on those investments no matter how lust-inducing the body parts on a diarist with three entries might be.

To no surprise some of those newcomers have learned through repetition that their appearances tend to gain attention, and so they’re so often among the quickest to post their own pictures as their avatars.  (how often do you see a not-so-confident teen whose avatar demands that you gaze with some intent at her ample cleavage?)

Still nothing tops a woman who seems perfectly willing to attach some personality to whatever appearance represents her on the outside.  It has always been quite interesting here at OD to learn candid details about the life outlooks of women who have the sought-after appearances.  That is perhaps the best type of informative voyeurism  I can imagine, in part because it is all so foreign to me.

Now I find myself trying to imagine what would be lost or different about prostitution if indeed it was the well-adjusted and confident members of society who were selling their sexual company on the streetcorners of my life.  Instead of there being constant motion in the shadows by women so damaged and/or insecure that they want only to surprise their tricks once they’re already in their cars, the poise and seeming confidence of the new working girls would probably drive today’s johns out of the business. (chuckles at that)

Instead of being sized-up for sexual worth by sometimes predatory men, the new working girls would intimidate the predatory men, and would perhaps upgrade the public perception OF prostitution by dating what would only be the lowest class of men who could actually handle the dare/opportunity.

Somehow the image of truly confident women turning tricks on the corner just doesn’t fit, because they don’t tend to match the sorts of guys who tend to be circling around in those cars. 

Lately I keep thinking about a woman I know… and about how much I’d just like to have my arms around her.  While there remain thoughts and temptations in the form of the constantly rejuvenating set of women selling their sexual company online and on the corner, I don’t tend to think too much about boning  this woman from real life.  Yet I can’t even describe the pure bliss that would be me lying naked by her side, arms wrapped around her.  Not long ago she and I spoke in-depth with regard to the appearance flaw about which she is most self-conscious, and I inspired her to speak candidly and in detail (well beyond what those who might ‘advise’ on such subjects, would allow).  It was such a personal  conversation, and yet the specifics of the flaw were no more significant to me than is random data.

Those who have read this diary for a while would be somewhat surprised by the woman I just mentioned, especially in light of how often (some) readers here envision me to be having sex with what are perceived to be stunning individuals.

The more engaged is the human mind, the less mere appearance  means to anyone, yet when just viewing from afar, human appearances are as interesting and as entertaining as anything.  The contrast is that we might all look like ants (are perceived to look, to one another, by humans).

(Ants are probably more distinct at some level than humans, although we could seldom be expected to figure it out)