Four DAYS!!!!

I have got so much to do tomorrow and Saturday..laundry, cleaning, shaving, finishing his blanket and a lil grocery shopping! I know the weekend is going to lag too, because I am so excited to see him. He is begining to show signs of excitment to see me too..lol…Which always makes me feel mushy inside. He’s not very good at expressing or showing emotion..he shows he cares and loves me by doing thing, but when he acts human, I just wanna squeeze him and giggle, lol. I can’t help but think of how much I love him, and I hope this butterfly feeling lasts as long as I am alive…

His blanket is almost done too, which is awesome because I am so sick and tired of working on it, haha. Its defintately not something I would do again, but I am glad I am doing it now for him. I get so many compliments on it, and everyone who sees it is in awe of what a great job I am doing. I guess thats what keeps me working on it, knowing its for him and he’ll love it, so I can’t turn back now. Plus I know I am doing an amazing job, and I wanna see it come to an end. (In a good way!)

Im so hungry too, I feel like I am starving and i am naucious. (NO, not pregnant, so stop thinking it..lol). Its because I have been working really hard at managing my money and so…in the middle of doing that I haven’t really eaten. Frank and my Mom keep harping on me to eat more, like I am going to waste away. But trust me, there’s plenty of me for my body to feed on, lol. But gas prices have shot up, and I spend so much in gas to get to and from work, and i had to pay a vet bill for my cat, and I want some leaisure money to spend while Frank is here…so I suffer with food a little while, it’s okay. I don’t see whatthe big deal is. But they seem to think I am going to pass out while I am driving or something. But bills have to be paid…otherwise I will be lacking in other things my person needs!

Well Rachel is BACK on with Steve, which you KNEW was going to happen. I expected it, four years is a long time to just walk away from. I know she was scared of being alone, not talking to him, she knew she’d miss the intimacy and the feeling of belonging to some one. The love that she spent so much time devoting to him and their relationship, and the friend she nearly lost on several occasions because of him..(me). So I knew she’d go back to him for those reasons alone. And I understand those feelings, it would be too difficult for me to give Frank up after so long. For those reasons as well I could say. BUT…I think she’s going to have a hard road ahead of her. She can’t possibly jump on the trust train again and be on board with him 100%. There’s no way. AND to top it off, he proposed to her. And she said yes. Had he not proposed to her when he did, after this big fight, I think she might have prolonged their seperation and really thought about the pros and cons of taking him back. But she IS the type of person, who if you flash something shiney and pretty at her…the past is..well pretty much forgotten. All she has ever wanted was to get married and have kids…and now he’s offering that to her so why not take it?

And as long as she’s happy…TRUELY, HONESTLY, UNDENIABLY, happy….then I support her totally…But I did warn her, if she felt one inkling of something about him she’s not trusting again, she needs to seriously look at it intensively to see if its still what she wants…especially before they get married…its so much easier to break up when wedding vows aren’t involved.(legally..)…I am supposed to meet them tonight at a bar, so this should be interesting. AND AND AND, the FUN part will be, MIGUEL (for those of you who have read my previous entries, you’ll know why this is so funny…) will be there. Talk about ACKWARD! But I’m gunna have a couple jello shots…and just sit back and watch….too bad there won’t be any popcorn…Coz I wanna see how jealous Miguel actually gets..lol…

But anyway, I am looking forward to 9 days of no work and total relaxation..and maybe a little work, 😉   I just want to kiss him, so bad. For so long….through lunch and dinner and Tuesday’s breakfast..haha.  I can’t help but talk about him like some kind of school girl, but I am so damn excited….Monday if you hear birds singing, fireworks popping and a symphany playing…..well, you’ll know I am incredibly happy at that moment….I just have this overwhelming urge to laugh and dance and sing….just…bubbling up inside of me, and it’s getting so hard to contain it….I’m not sure I can anymore!!! 

But alas, I must end my paper work here at work…of course…where I ALWAYS am…plus I have neglected to write down like everyone I have checked in…lol..and there has been a lot so I better get busy!!