About Last Night… The Novel

   It is so cool to sit here in my living room, facing the huge wall of flor to ceiling windows and watch it rain and storm outside. I can see the the leaves blowing everywhere, and the air is starting to cool down….which before it was ungodly hot and humid when I got up this morning/afternoon.  It’s so comforting.

   Well….last night was crazy insane and I actually had a really good time.  A few nights ago I had made plans to go out with Jessica again to a dance club and invited Rachel to come along. Yesterday I tried reaching Jessica all day to make sure our plans were still on but I couldn’t reach her. Finally at like 7 she calls me at work and tells me she can’t go because she doesn’t have any money.  But that she rented some movies and her and Lily (my God-daughter) could come over and we could watch them when I got off work. <B>{So how did she rent movies if she had no money? and how is she going to afford gas to come up here and make it hom if she had no money? I don’t know why she just couldn’t be honest and say either she couldn’t find a babysitter OR she just didn’t want to go…}</B>  I told her nah, that it’s okay, we could go next weekend when we both got paid again, and not to worry about it. I could just go home and crash or something.  So we agreed on that.   Then I send Rachel a text message saying Jessica backed out and so now I didn’t really have plans to go out. Hope that she could tag on with some one else and have a good time.  But she said her and her new best friend <B>{My replacement after the whole Miguel incident, lol. }</B> were coming up here and wanted me to come too.   So we met at a the bar/club like 15 minutes after I got off work.  Screw sitting at home on a Saturday night.  
 
  Also, if anything like the Miguel thing happened again I could just get in my car and go home. She wasn’t my ride or anything. (I am still not trusting of my saftey around her yet.) So anyway when we got upstairs to the dance floor, it wasn’t that crowded, which made me wonder if we should have gone somewhere else. But then like 5 minutes later the place was PACKED. Shoulder to shoulder people.  So we got something to drink and start to loosen up, start laughing and having a good time.  After two or three more drinks we head out to the dance floor for a bit. A funny mexican dude kept following me around the dance floor, which was pretty funny because I still swear up and down he was gay. Like, yeah, very flamboyant and like wearing a low v-cut t-shirt. It was crazy. He could dance though, so I really didn’t mind. Gay dudes make totally better dancers than straight ones, haha. By this time I was feeling more than tipsy because all I had for dinner was yogurt and a small cup of peaches. So it was hitting me pretty hard.  I know I was definately messing up my words and I know if I had to walk a straight line to pass a sobriety test, I’d surely fail, haha.   Well we went to the bar for a last drink, and while there the mexican dude grabs my hand and tries to pull me into his little circle. I finally got free from his grasp and got to where Rachel and her friend Melissa was at, and like these black dudes starting grabbing my butt! I would turn around to confront the culprit and they’d stop. But when I’d turn back around again they’d start up!! I know I have a ghetto booty, but JEEZ. You know what else was kind of cool?  I had guys hitting on ME for a change. lol. Granted alcohol DOES change the look of some girls to guys, haha. The whole…cyote ugly thing..lol.

     Well then last calle came and they started kicking everyone out…only we were so hyped up, we didn’t WANT to go home.  It was only like 1am. So as we were walking back to our cars trying to figure out what we were going to do for a while so we didn’t have to drive in our condition we see the Hush Puppy bus. The Hush Puppy is a strip club on the other side of the river. This side of the river our town doesn’t …..well strip clubs don’t last in this down.  Just like casino and other revenues for "sin" do.  But bars manage to stay open…which totally befuzzles me, lol. What REALLY is the difference than getting plastered, gambling or looking at a stripper? Any one of those supposedly makes you good friends with the Devil…so yeah…hypocrits. Anyway, Rachel convinced me to go to the Hush Puppy, into the bus we climbed. Only I stumbled into the second row of seats, and I confess that was a little difficult, lol. The drivers were very friendly and seemed happy they finally picked up some riders. (Guess they were having a slow night.) We were joking around how we should work there because we’d make mad money. And the drivers are like, you guys are hot, you should totally work there!!! I don’t remember the whole conversation, but I remember laughing A LOT.

      Finally we stumble in, Rachel gets us another drink and I go in search for a bathroom. Lol yeah, that was fun. It took me a while to find it. Even though I realize now it was just around the corner from the bar, lmao.  I felt kinda bad for the "dancers" though. Like they didn’t look like they were enjoying themselves at all, and they looked very mechanical and bored.  I can ‘t see selling myself like that if it wasn’t something I enjoyed. Revealing my most intimate parts…you know? I mean if I liked showing it, flaunting it, teasing with it, then I would naturally find joy in stripping. These girls looked bored. And really didn’t have much talent either. Like drunk I could have done better, and I am shy, lol.

      Rachel starts joking about how there’s a sex store attached to the club, and I was like, LETS GO!!! I’ve never been inside one before. And I have always been a LITTLE curious, but last night I was lot curious. Haha. Melissa just wants to sit down, so we sit her on the bench by the door and in we go! Yeah, I remember a LOT more laughing in there than in the bus, haha.  Some of the stuff looked down right scary. And some stuff could only fit like…the hole in an elephant. I don’t think any normal girl could take some of the toys they had in there, lol. If they could, I’d be a bit worried about them. Yeah so Rachel bought us each a bullet? and some penis pacifiers on a keychain, lmao. We were such girls in the store too. Very giggly. Pointing, laughing, cracking indecent jokes.

    Well we finally get back on the bus to go back accross the river to downtown, and when we get on the bus we have our brown bags from "Brown Bag Video" and the bus was loaded with guys who all start hooping and hollering about what was in our bags, lol. I was mortified. I tried to back off the bus but Rachel pulled me back in and I sat down on a seat.  But the guys were being all friendly and making jokes. There were two guys sitting next to me, both in white shirts, and another guy was sitting accross from them telling us how these guys got drunk and started displaying "gay tendencies" lol. Then I look over and the one guy sitting right next to me had his pants pulled down! I was like OMG! Then the guy sitting accross from us starts talking about lap dances, and I talked the guy onthe other side of the guy sitting next to me to give Rachel one, (he too had his pants down) and then Rachel pulls out her penis pacifier and the dudes pull down their boxers to compare!!! OMG….I went hysterical. Everyone on the bus went hysterical. (Except Rachel because where she was sitting on the other side of me, she really couldn’t see what was going on.) So he goes over to her and starts giving her a lap dance. And the guy who was sitting right next to me  gets up and takes the shirt off the guy dancing for Rachel because his shirt was covering his…you know. Well yeah, off comes the shirt and BAM. There he was, in all his smal glory.

    Whats REALLY sad is that I think he was smaller than the pacifier, lmao. Like if I were him, I would have NOT pulled down my pants to show what little I had. Haha. 0—>  *Pacifier    0–>*Stripper dude. lmao  Then he sits down in front of Rachel and like, just spreads his legs. My face turn beat red and I looked away. The the guy sitting next to me decides he wants to get totally naked and dance for us too. (Both by the way, very bad dancers, so they couldn’t even work what they had….feel sorry for their girlfriends if they have any lol.)  Then the other guy who was instigating all of this asked Rachel and I to flash him, I said no but Rachel did. lol I was shocked, but not shocked. She is a lot wilder than I am.  Though I guess after last night I can’t claim to be a good girl anymore. =/  But it’s okay, I DID have a good time. After we got off the bus, we went to Denny’s to try and soak up some of our…beveraged drinks.  Rachel and I downed our food in like 3 minutes.  I don’t even remember paying for our meal but I am sure we did. lol.  Then I told her they could stay at my house since they had no business driving 40 minutes away in their condition. When we got to my house, guess who was asleep in my bed? Yes…Jessica and Lily.   Why were they there? I don’t know. I was a little peeved though. It was my bed, and I wanted to sleep in it. Find it kind of rude to just assume I wouldn’t mind.  So I grabbed some blankets and pillows and the three of us crashed on my living room floor and couch.    Tonight the Hush Puppy is supposed to have male strippers.  Rachel want’s to go, but I have two tests to study for. Two HARD tests to study for. So it’s probably wise if I just stay home and hit the text books.

   Anyway, so that was my eventful Saturday night!