6 Days And Counting

So I took Frank’s Christmas present in to be engraved today. I got kind of mad at the clerk because she was so snotty and every time I asked a question she gave a real big sigh and rolled her eyes like I was wasting her time. I guess customer service isn’t the position for her. So I wanted his initials on the front of the pocket watch and ‘Always HP ’04” on the back..but I guess because of how its made it would be too risky to put his initials on the front because it might move in the machine and mess the whole front up. So she suggested I put it on the back. Thats not what I wanted..but the idea was to personalize it and make it special and I guess even though it will all be on the back the idea still remains.  I know he wont use it daily or anything..but I want him to have it anyway..I hope he likes it.. I also bought the game he wanted..so if he doesn’t like the watch at least he’ll have the game! lol Thought I would kick my mom out of the house and make him a nice dinner and we can celebrate our “christmas” then.  Any ideas on what I should make?!!!!!

Another night at work and it took me 30 minutes to get through that paragraph because the silly phone keeps ringing. And as soon as I would sit down to begin writing again a customer would walk in. Don’t they have homes to be in? lol People should be at home or at work, not traveling!!!!!!!!! okay..maybe I shouldn’t be in customer service either lol..Well not lately anyway. I have been working for the hotel for two years and I haven’t gotten a vacation. They don’t offer them. I think I am just getting burnt out. I think this year when my anniversary rolls around they can either give me some days off or lose one of their best employees..whatever works for them.  I have been working full time since I was 16. It feels like it should be time to retire! I got a bit of a reprieve today. I called the university and they said I had until the 12th to get the financial aid started. I should find out in the next couple days if I am approved. Sometime tonight I am gunna see what I have to do to sign up for some student loans. I don’t want to do loans..I don’t want to owe more money…but if thats what I have to do to make something of myself in the long run it has to be worth it.

I am looking forward to the next two days being off. I am going to take down all the christmas decorations and get everything straightened up for my visitor.  I had the house all cleaned last Saturday and so far my mom has been doing a good job of helping me keep it that way, but I don’t know how long that will last. I am sure by the time I go home tonight there will be trash and dishes lying around…I remember what the house looked like after I got back from NY this past June and it was disgusting..and if I don’t keep up with it..it gets that way again. I can’t imagine how she’ll live when I finally move away. Its kind of scarey..she hasnt paid any bills so we might lose cable..(big whoop)…the internet..her car insurance…she’s negative like 200 bucks in her checking account..but by god she has ciggeretts! i wish I was a smoker..so I could just pull money out of thin air..then I wouldnt have all these financial problems! lol…And then I envy Frank because he’s going to Oxford and his parents are paying for everything…they give him money to spend and he never has to worry about bills..he has a great social life…and then I get mad at myself for being jealous because why shouldn’t he have those things? He shouldn’t have to struggle because I do..I want him to have a great experience..but I want one too! I don’t wanna worry about the things  I have to worry about…

I keep letting the money get me down..I try not to..but its getting hard and I let it stress me out. Today on Oprah they’re talking about people who invented something and now have millions….like the guy who invented dots….I wish I were clever!

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