reading back into old entries

 i’m not so happy on how things have gone. first my life next to george  hasn’t been the greatest since he has a horrible attitute he’s hit me 3 times already..we’ve had serious problems and i’ve cried more than i cried when i was with jose. my love for jose was real but i know now that he never took me seriously..he cheated on me with more than 3 girls from what i heard from natasha…..with george is different i learned to love him over time and i was miserable when i found out about the other girl…for some reason i didn’t leave and that was a stupid thing of me to not do….on march of this year i found out i was pregnant…i was happy but it was also devastating because i knew i wouln’t be happy as long as that girl is still around….things have changed so much or should i say people have changed so much, george is not like before sometimes he makes me think that he doesn’t care about me…..chuy is now confirmed that he is gay..in fact he is living with dario….they both have changed…there can be times when they annoy me…dario became my best friend for sometime until i realized that he was phony….. i now have my baby son ryan…he is so adorable and now he is the only thing i have….after 21 hours of labor…he was finally out, he is soon to be a month old and i’m so happy i cant’ wait till he grows a little older…..i still dont’ know what’s going to happened with george and me but i cant leave him….not because of me but because of my baby..i dont’ want him to suffer like i did without my father it’s really horrible to have that kind of life…