Mom

They did her EEG today.  Will know the results soon.  Then a MRI.  Hope to know those results soon.  Called her doctor to find out if he even knew she was in the hospital.  Got thier fucking voice mail.  Guess I’ll try again later.  Have to call her psychatrist.  She told me while she was having the first seizure, she told God it was okay to take her because Jesse would be taken care of.  Blew me away.

What an I supposed to feel?  All I know at this point is dread.  I dread what may happen next.  Last night her seizures got worse.  So much worse in fact, that her jaws locked down and the nurses had to pad the bed to keep her from getting hurt and shove tounge depressors in her mouth to kept her from biting her tounge off or even swallowing it.  These are some things I never wanted to learn could happen.  Noe she is sedated, in hopes that will keep her from seizing.

Before I left the hospital today, she asked me if I was still going to let her hold the baby?  I told her of course.  Now I’m home and my heart is broken.  What could possibly make her think I would keep her granddaughter from her?  She must think she is never going to recover.

Mandy