I hate you

I just want my kid back.  That’s all.  Oh and you to fall off the face of the earth never to reappar again.  Never to make me miserable. 

Never to come here and have my daughter cry her eyes out because she doesn’t want to be in that hell hole you live in. 

Doesn’t want to be put in front of the tv to be ignored until you decide its time to shove her in a church pew and ignore her some more. 

Doesn’t want to be away from the family she knows love her and adore her and spend every waking minute with her.

She’s not stupid, you know.  She is far more intelligent than you.  She knows that the reason you take her is to try and get to me.  She tells me you don’t want to play with her.  You give her candy and koolaid and plop in the room.  She complains about not getting a bath and her hair being nasty from not getting brushed.

Oh how I wish I could prove it all.  I would show how you send her away so you can play your fucking Playstation.  How you leave her with that fuckign woman who wants my daughter to call her mom, but could never be. 

You bitch and moan because you only have her on some weekends.  You wouldn’t fucking be able to handle having her any more.  You didn’t when we were married.  You would send her in her room back then.  Why the fuck would  you stop to pay attention to her now?

She is a beautiful, loving, sweet girl, who craves attention and love.  She wants to read and paint and sing.  She wants to be the center of your world, but you will never be able to figue that out.  To you, she is a possesion you can take from me every other weekend.  You can bask in my tears as I have to wave good-bye.

Just remember, you are a weekend father.  Nothing more.  You don’t deserve more.  You don’t deserve what you get now.  When she is old enough to make her descions, you can be damn sure I won’t do anything to change her mind other wise.  If she wants to stay and tell you to fuck off, so be it.  Its your loss,

Sorry fucker.

Y’all take care,

Mandy

Ovarian cancer: It whispers, so listen.