Another Letter.

He sent me this a couple of days ago.  I haven’t responded yet.  I don’t think I will either.  Its just so late for apologies.

hello this is something I have been wanting to do for a long time,
it may not sound like I mean it but I swear I do and if I forget anything let me know
 first I wanted to let you know I am not whining and I am not trying to get you back its just some thing I feel you deserve I cant change what I have done just myself
ready here it goes
I am sorry for treating you like shit for 6 years
I am sorry for not truly appreciating all you did for me
I am sorry for not listening to you and your feelings all the time
I am sorry for feeling threatened by your family
I am sorry for trying to control you
I am sorry for being a lousy provider
for always complaining about being a bum who cant drive and who had a bad job instead of doing some thing about it
I am sorry for being a lousy husband
I am sorry for being a lousy Dad at times
I am sorry for being a lousy all around person 98 percent of the time and then covering it up by saying its not my fault its who I am that’s bull shit we all make choices in life
we sculpt who we are not the events we go through in life
I am sorry for treating you like crap for not having a job
I am sorry for being a smart ass and once again saying that’s just me bull shit
I am sorry for every negative thing I said about your Grandmother she had a good reason to hate me (I don’t understand how your mother doesn’t well besides just saying that’s Julie she has always been full of nothing but love its not the first time she forgave something unforgivable)
I am sorry for every sexual and inappropriate thing I said to Brandy I cant even explain why I would do that to you or her I ruined a great thing
I am sorry for walking away from are marriage I know that was a huge mistake more than I can say
I am sorry for always whining always wanting things easy never wanting to work for it and its always some one Else fault not mine
I am sorry for lying all the time 
I am sorry if it bothers you when I say I love you I cant help it I do, part of me says to leave you alone and another part says man you got to try and fix this you idiot
 
I hope you know I mean every word of this I thought you might not  because of the format it may seem like I am just throwing it out but I did mean it  and this is not easy for me,and I do understand how you feel I am not trying to get you back like I said you deserve it and a lot more