Love :)
What are your personal definitions of Love? I find this a curious topic because so many people my age seem to think that love is something you feel for "kindred spirits" and others would say that it’s what happens when you truly know someone. That seems a little limiting to me. And love really shouldn’t have limits. Besides, no one can say that you’re not special because everyone has something about them that makes them unique. Maybe if we were to look for that something in everybody, then we would find there’s almost no one we cannot love.
I was thinking about this in the context of my new boyfriend, Brandon. He’s truly a wonderful person. Brandon makes me laugh and feel accepted. When I think of his smile, I smile. When I imagine him overcoming his personal obstacles and accomplishing his dreams I am filled with this overwhelming happiness. I dont think it would matter whether or not he was my boyfriend, I’m just so grateful to have met someone like him, someone so full of goodness and beauty to offer the world…. I am happy God blessed me with another person in my life to care about.
But most people would not say that is love. Most would say that I do not know him well enough, or that I’m too young to understand such concepts. And that’s alright I think… because if I were to meet those people I’m sure I could prove them wrong. I’m sure that while I may not know many of them very well, I could certainly find something to love about all of them. I do agree with such people in some ways however. For instance, I think love grows the more you know someone. But I also think love may grow at different rates for different people.
I’ve met people at my camp, and known them for only a couple days before I loved them. The moment I saw my nieces and nephews for the first time I loved them. Whereas it took me a year to love my best friend Amy (maybe more) and I’ve fallen in and out of love for my family more times than I can count.
But I do love my nieces and nephews more than when I first met them and i find more things to love about my friends every day.
Ok so back to the original issue – what is love?
I guess it’s different for different people and our definitions change as we grow. I used to think love was a combination of factors. Such as how you connect with someone, how likeable/relateable they are, how much you enjoyed each others company ect. Now however I’ve come to realize that Love is when you find the beauty and goodness within someone else. It is when you appreciate this goodness. When you would give them your kindness and strength and whatever else they needed to make them happy. Basically I believe that love is unconditional and does not have such requirements as chemistry or "knowing someone well enough". (although they may improve it)
But I do think that my parents love each other much more than when they were first married, and love me more than when I was first born.
What I’m trying to say here about my personal defnitions of love is that I can love anyone. That even in the most evil of people there must be something to love. (now dont go confusing can with WILL, I will not love a psychopath or an evil dictator)
Perhaps you dont believe me? Maybe you’re thinking of someone at work or school who really grinds your gears. Well then I have a challenge for you! Chat with them once or twice. Be kind to them. Ask them to hangout. Do something for them. Rinse and repeat (let’s say three times). And afterwards if you have found nothing about them to love then you’ll have (sort of) proved me wrong. But if you do find something within them to love then note how you feel afterwards. Isn’t it great to be able to connect with anybody? I used to find Amy terribly boring and Sasha incredibly intimidating, but after putting in the effort to care about them I’ve discovered that they are two of the greatest friends I’ll ever have.
I read something on the internet recently. I based much of my definitions of love of that article. However I can no longer find it. So whoever wrote it I just want to thank you for expanding my view of love.
The article went on to say that if you give you will love. and the more you give the more you love. I thought that was beautiful. Loving can make you giving and giving can make you loving! the article even went on to mention a similar story to my Amy/Sasha one and how this man discovered that when he gave to a woman he didn’t particularily like she gave back to him all the goodness she had to offer.
Ok but thats my definition of love. I love my boyfriend, but we’re not in love yet, and there’s nothing that could make me ashamed of my love. How could I ever feel bad about meeting such a wonderful person? That would be like saying I regret that my Mom is my Mom or that Amy and Sasha are my friends. Impossible.
now what are your definitions of love? Do you think I’m right (my definitions based on a religious man’s judeo-christian interpretation, there could be many more "correct" ideas)? Do you think it’s not so simple or not so complicated? I’m genuinely curious.
*random noter* Hi, just stopped by to read your entry (it was on the front page). You wrote a beautiful post and I nominated it for Reader’s Choice. Hope you have a wonderful week! 🙂 Take care.
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