Take A Look Into My Eyes

INVISIBLE
wobbling here
on a stack so tall
that i fear i’ll never
feel steady and still
 at all
inside out
i’m all washed up
all worn out
could i bear your forgiveness?
and i shake
and i pulse in your arms
so unsteady
and your love so
rock solid
and my tears so clear
the future’s a blur
and the past grabs me
around the ankles
and fear digs in – well,
would i breathe if i could?
 i wouldn’t recognize
this world if it gave me a chance
to suck in that sweet air,
i wouldn’t trust the world
unless it left me there
alone….
the fire in my eyes
shrinking and the world’s still
turning…
yet,
the world is
slamming the door
before my eyes
And i push against it in vain
what is love, what is life?
i won’t prove my worth…
dare i utter that word?…
… will it destroy me
or give me the peace
i’ve been looking for
what’s a world without chaos?
untamed boredom, that’s all
and im always unsatisfied
always curiously searching..
… have i found the answer?
i’m invisible.

don’t forget me
don’t leave me here
please forgive me
just don’t forget me here.

invisibility?
what is it….
a bold, stark word.

if you knew me
you wouldn’t think me invisible…
but rather invincible.
im not indestructable
you’d knock me down
with just one blow.
play it up
play it off
it wouldn’t matter
it’d be better to just blend in.
what’s a problem?
i have a problem..
… and so do you!
i’ll let you flick your gaze over me
and then i’ll just…
…disappear.

do i feign my prescence here?
you all swear you see me
but as soon as the
words are out of your mouth
my name, my laughter
is just a memory
flitting away in the string of time.

who wants to be forgotten?
not i.
remember me
put my name in bold print.

tell me you love me
say you could never ever live without me

please, please don’t let me fade away
i don’t want to be that wisp of breath
against your skin
for just a moment.

i want to live.
i want to open my eyes
and breathe in sweet air.
i want you to feel my warm hand
on your arm
i want you to know me
i don’t want you to forget me.

i want you to say,
"She told me-
I’m glad she’s here."

i don’t want to be the one
who is invisible.
listen to my story,
listen to my laugh,
watch me live,
don’t let me die.
i don’t want to fade away,
i don’t want to flicker and die out.

I want to live.

 make me live.

i  d o n t  w a n t  t o  b e  i n v i s i b l e .

<3 amanda