prison

10pm entry
There are a wide variety of inmates on my caseload. It is interesting to be a healthcare provider in a prison. I learn something new every day and try hard to wrap my head around the concept of caring for people who have been cast out of society for the horrible things they have done (or have been accused of doing). How do you provide care for a murderer, a rapist, or pedophiles? How do you view them as a person, not as a perpetrator. I don’t have easy answers– I don’t think easy answers exist. I just know that for me it works to view my caseload of inmates as who they are at that moment, like it is one chapter of a long, complicated book. I am a nurse. I am not a judge. I am not a jury. I am not a victim, and I will not be a perpetrator by punishing them for their crimes/charges.

Prison has taught me about the power of hope. One of my inmates is in his mid-twenties. He committed a horrible murder when he was a teenager. He was sentenced to a term of 40 years to life. We talk a lot about how to keep going day after day. He wonders a lot about Heaven and hell, and if there is any chance he can find redemption. He says he stays alive because his mother is alive and would be crushed if he took his life. He says the tiny glimmer of hope that a 40 years to life sentence gives him is that his mother is young and may still be alive in 40 years when he is eligible for parole. I look at him and think of how lucky I am to not have to ponder those questions.

respectfully submitted,
K. (temporary blogathoner)

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