drop it like it’s hot

 so i’ve been naughty. terrible in fact. and i feel horrible and guilty, and i know i am a terrible terrible person and i will go to whatever the equiavelent of hell is.

i’ve been rewatching desperate housewives, and i guess the drama and intrigue and mystery has rubbed off on me..ive been doing mega snooping. 

i’ll start with the latest bout. the power at my place went out entirely, so i’ve shifted to the flat above my dad’s practice. when i arranged it with my dad, i didnt realise that my evil (probably now a good person) cousin lives here. it is awkward to say the least. and i dont really like it here. but at least i have a little privacy and my mum can cook for me downstairs. it is completely isolated here. and my cousin is busy at work with my dad. so naturally…ive snooped around. this girl ruined my family, i think i am entitled to look around. im pretty sure ive left my fingerprints on everything. and i hadnt really found much. when i used to snoop in my sister’s room i used to find LOADS of stuff. poems. written diary entries on random sheets of paper. ticket stubs from movies she went to with people i knew of. photos of her in nightclubs drinking. 
all that i have found are remnants of a broken woman. she got divorced after she married in a rush of 1 month. and it was an ugly divorce. i know hoarders keep coins everywhere. coppers and 5p pieces. loose change with a couple of 20p’s here and there. naturally there are coins everywhere in this room. in everydrawer. pens and old pairs of glasses. a stamp collectors book, an album of old photos. a lonely engagement ring in a crystal box in a pretty ornamental box under the coffee table. a small floral tin of red powder stuff in a tiny set of mirror drawers amongst the coins and random keys that open some window in some house. 

why has she kept this stuff? the ring i can understand. but the sindoor? i wonder what that was like to keep. when she moved here and stuffed things into boxes, and she came across her tin of sindoor and decided to keep it. the tin she was given when she entered her mother-in-law’s home. 

the other snooping was my sister’s facebook. i dont really know how it started. i think i just typed in her email address to see what her profile pic was. and then i typed in the only password i knew she ever USED to use. i didnt expect that to work. i literally jumped out of my seat when it unlocked her front page. there was nothing to see really. and i learnt not alot. other than the fact taht she removed a lot of her old friends, that i expected she still had. her life looks kinda cool. and it convinces even ME that she has changed.

but then i remember all the little things she’s said before. and the little things she’s done. and i remember facebook is full of shit, and people put stuff on there to show other people. not for themselves.
and i remember she is still the same. and i shouldnt be so swayed by something so fickle. 

anyway.snoopsnoopsnoop.