I will never be happy
When I get to 125 I know I won’t be satisfied. I just know it. Please don’t tell me I will because I know in my head I won’t. Why because after being fat for 37 years it’s hard to re-train your brain. People have repeatedly told me I don’t look like I weigh 140 but I do and I know I do.
I guess I need to work from the inside out now before I go back to the piss poor attitude I’ve had for the last 30 years where I just didn’t give a rats ass what I looked like because on the inside I didn’t care either.
Why do I think 140 is such an awful weight? I know it’s not, really but it is to me. I dunno I can’t explain it.
Please excuse this entry it was just a way of expressing my thoughts.
Carry on…
Short term goalUltimate Goal
I feel for you because I understand completely. In the last year I have gained 40-50 pounds because I was “dieting” to get skinny. Little did I know how much I would look back at my “fatness” and realize I wasn’t fat at all. You might be against it, but what about counselling? I think we need to retrain our thinking. I can see you not being satisfied at 125. It is hard to change the mental pictue.
Warning Comment
*hugs* It’s not about being physically repulsive to yourself, it’s not about the weight anymore. It’s about YOU, on the inside. You need to retrain your inner dialogue. Maybe counseling would be a good idea?
Warning Comment
Maybe talking to someone would be able to get you in the right frame of mind to come to terms with your new body?I personally don’t think itis bad idea. Although I am sure when I get in there, all hell would break loose and I would never leave the chair 😉 Hope you start to feel better. And next time…please don’t apologize for or excuse your feelings. *hugs* XOXO
Warning Comment
I understand. I feel the same. I have lost almost 30 pounds now and everyone says I look fine, but I disagree. My goal weight is 140 but I would like to be 120. Do what is right for you.
Warning Comment
it takes awhile for our brains to catch up. it will in time.
Warning Comment
I completely agree with risk x reality!
Warning Comment
I know just how you feel.
Warning Comment
I’ve never gotten so close to goal – so I can’t totally relate – but I don’t think ANYONE is happy with how they look. Even people you think look PERFECT still think they have a flat butt or big ears or something. Even if you can’t see it. It’s not a bad thing to keep trying to make yourself better – as long as you don’t get down on yourself and you don’t do anything extreme.
Warning Comment
I WISH I knew what 140 looked or felt like! LOL I am double that, plus some… so cheer up, silly! It’s ok to be worried and stressed, but that is such a healthy weight. Hopefully you can get comfy in your own skin and realize that you are FINE the way you are! 🙂
Warning Comment
I feel you. Totally.
Warning Comment
I really do understand.. because I am the same way. And I wish I had more motivation, like you. Because I would love to be 140! You’ve doone soo well, do not think you’re still fat, because you are NOT! It’s taken me a while, to be happy w/myself.. and I am a little bit better, but it just takes time, and support. And I will give ya all i can!!
Warning Comment
=) Sometimes the weight being gone doesnt feel real…and no matter how much i lose, i will always be overweight, because thats the way its always been, ive never been small..so its hard to think of myself that way….hopefully we can both realize we are beautiful and SMALLER than before…lol. Working from the insdie out is a good idea=) Keep it up! Have a great weekend!!!
Warning Comment
I can understand that but then when I weighed 115 I thought I was fatter than I imagine myself now.
Warning Comment
i feel the same. i know i won’t settle for being happy at 140, even though i’ll be pleased to hit it (because it’s a loss, right?). people at work keep telling me i don’t need to lose anymore, but i’m not happy with how i look, & i’m still overweight, & still hardly a small dress size!
Warning Comment