I don’t want you to see me like that.

These are the words that I was repeating billion times in my head… But I was brave to say them loud maybe twice. I had migraine on Tuesday and Wednesday. Maciek texted me on Thursday:
What about seeing today? I miss you.
I really wanted to see him. Had terrible head and sinuses were burning, but I agreed. He came. I tried to look good for him. I always do. What means that I try to look pretty 6 days a week. Hugging and stuffs. Day before I had terrible fever. It was difficult to stand. I was sleeping all day long. Waiting for anything to happen, because nothing was helping me. The only thing I wanted were his arms, because it helps me. I feel the safest girl in the world when he is near. His wide arms holding my little body. So when he appeared I got happier. We spend nice time together. We meet yesterday too. It helped me too. I just hope he didn’t catch my infection…

Talking about my infection… I don’t really know what’s that. My chronic infection was "killed" over year ago. And I was doing really good. I don’t know what might went wrong. I just hope I won’t need to stay in hospital… I am always scared that I will be send to hospital for treatment. Ugh… Breathing is so difficult. I used to dance all day long, go for shopping, kiss, talk… you know LIVE! But now I can’t. Luckily I am used to this situation. I will go through it.

The hardest is the fact that I have just 26 days till summer holidays. We are being graded till 20th June. And we are writing exams 24th-27th June.

Tomorrow I have my last biology in my HS career. My current grade is 4+, but I am too ambitious and planned to write "last chance quiz" from ecology. I hate ecology, it’s so boring! But having 5 from biology on my school diploma would be nice achievement.

Tomorrow I am also planing to see my doctor, to find out what’s wrong with me and get some therapy. So I probably won’t go to school. Just appear on biology to get good mark. Hope everything goes good and I will be happy and healthy back. I mean I am so happy but still not healthy.

Pain is back in town. But I hope that power will be back soon too.

It’s 8.20PM I’d better start to study biology.

Leaving you with some pictures. Sorry for quality, but these were taken with my BlackBerry.

Love you!

Yay! biology!