Loser

Ok..it’s 17:20….i should be on my way to band practice..but I’m not. Why? Because today I’m fucking lazy and a fucked-up loser. I woke up at 14:15 (after taking 2 hours to get home…fell asleep on the buses) and last night i drank:

2 pints of cider

4 pints of strawberry beer

3 glasses of water

1 coke

Needless to say it was getting grim for me at 4am as it was all kicking in and I went home..ended up having a nice little early morning tour of town as i missed my stop 3times in a row. Why did I go drinking so much yesterday? Oh yes, that’s right:

Because I failed my year (again!!! 4 times now!!)

I whack off too much (too much porn)

I lust after Rina

I talk badly of people (but that’s very 2 ways)

I don’t tidy up my room as much as I should

I flirt with ugly people

I’m jealous of Audrey Stella sex-life

I should find a part-time job soon

I should write letters more

Can’t bothered to keep promises to people who I don’t really care about that much

See? All in all I’m a waster. I lie,i make-up, i’m caring about my hair too much, i do things halfway, i’m a lil bitdrunk right now (still). Audrey Stella came back to the land on Monday. I rang on Wed but she was with her 2 girlfriends drinking. I didn;t believe her so I rung one of the girls and it was true. My distrusting nature as risen and now i’m re-entering the cycle of loath-and-self-lothing. Missed her call today at 9:44..and again at 14:05..got a text 5 mins ago from her…i’ll have to speak to her eventually..*sigh*

Why do I care so little now? ABout girls, work, life, health, friends etc? all i care about right now this minute is porn, Orihime my kitten, jumping, fighting, vengence, and water

Help…