A New Beginning

I was here before.  Once.  Almost a decade ago.  I had a journal here, and I kept my thoughts and my dreams, my wishes and my fears all within these digital pages.  And then the world moved on.  I lost track of my journal, let it wilt away and then, when I couldn’t stand the thought of losing all of that work, all of those words of mine, thousands and thousands of them, I downloaded my journal, put it on a flash drive.  And then promptly lost it.

I think that’s a good way to think of life.  You spend so much time and energy working on holding onto something, on to remembering and trying not to forget, and then you turn your back once and when you turn around again, it’s gone.  I miss those thoughts, those words, those parts of my inner self that work as a snapshot of my mind and of who I was at that moment in time, but they’re gone, and I’ll never be that person again.

I’m not the person I was 10 years ago, that person was younger, yes, but also less mature and less knowledgable.  That person was still years away from seeing the bottom of the chasm, from falling into it brokenly, and then from beginning her climb back to the top.  Or at least, to where I am now.

I hope that ten years from now, I’ll be able to look back at this journal, at a copy of these words and understand where I was today, what I was thinking or seeing or dreaming.  I hope to be able to find my hopes, my dreams, my fears and my wishes, all caught up in this journal.  Or, perhaps, in one like it.

So, Hello self, hello readers.

A little about me.

At this point in my life my friends call me “Chris.” I work in an office environment.  I’m 24 years old, a virgo, and my mother currently lives with me.  I like playing video games and computer games as well as writing and reading.  It’s the 12th of November and I’m at 25,017 words for this year’s NaNoWriMo, which is titled “Centauri Primitus” and which features a girl named Malinda and an alien named Leheian.  I’m listening to Kamelot and dating a boy named Scott, who is sweet, if a little young.
Hello World.