yeah yeah ladies

i know, i know. i am pretty much a fool.
no girl in her right mind should be with someone who cheats.

i guess this whole situation is a little more complicated than that. the circumstances were awful, and i am truly hurt that he did cheat on me. but i am also cautious, rational and forgiving. i believe in people, and truly think that they can make right out of their wrongs.
so jason and i have had many a discussion about his actions. i still cry about it, and i know he feels awful. last night i sat in my bed and weeped while he rubbed my back. a shitty asshole boyfriend wouldn’t stand for that. who wants to sleep next to a crier?
this whole cheating thing has caused some big problems though. the other girl and her friends hate me. because i was too mean to her. ha. she told my boyfriend i had genital warts and tried to have sex with him. she’s lucky i didn’t shoot her. the fact that i sent a strongly worded letter in which i demanded an apology, it was reasonable.
so she and her friends started some drama last night…
and my best friend just took off on it. alexia wants me to play "the game." she thinks i need to lead jason on, always keep him guessing. drive by his house to check his stories, dress like a slut so other men want me, just lots of crap. i do not believe in any of that. i don’t have time to play these game with him. she was so adamant and forceful, it was hard to disagree with her. she said that she doesn’t approve of my relationship because i am acting naive and letting him walk all over me. but i truly think i am a strong enough woman to realize when i am being walked on. i think it is wrong that she will only approve of my relationship if i am playing games with him.

i am just frustrated. i do not want my best friend and my boyfriend to be at odds. and i know, that she will never give in on her ideas.

 

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November 1, 2006

Random drive-by noting…. if you start playing “the game”, you are headed for an episode of Jerry Springer, and you will become one of the trashy types who uses phrases like “I got a man.” Your best friend is flat out wrong. If you want to stay with the guy, you have to give him the benefit of the doubt. If you can’t, then you just have to end it. I’ll tell you from experience that trying tobe somewhere in between just isn’t going to make you happy.