charcoal heart

i am going to loose it. i put my bag on the dining room chair. i come back and my brother had dumped my bad upside down so all of the contents hit the floor. my hundred dollar palm pilot and cell phone included. so i yell at him to move. my mom tells me to deal with it and grounds me. then my dad comes downsatirs and tells me i am an asshole blah blah blah. so i yell at him. he has no place to bother me for something he didn’t even witness. this all took place in 2 minutes. my mom has only been home for 20 minutes and i have only been home for an hour. she then tells me i have been acting like an asshole all day, even thought neither one of us has been at home all day.

i am crying, and i haven’t cried in a while.

supposedly jenni and i are supposed to go to a ski meet tomorrow. i really can’t go. i have obligations tomorrow morning and afternoon. i told her my dad said know, but i just felt bad telling the truth.

winter ball has been resceduled. it is really stupid, and i am quite depressed about this. it is now March 20, the day after the Oscar party, and my 17.5 birthday. i was really excited for winter ball. i had the clothes picked out, the alchohol ordered and my hair appt. i had to cancel the hair appt. i am still getting the alchohol and i can wear the clothes later. but i’m not so great at just saving alchohol and letting it sit in my room. i like to use it.

so now i am hanging out with alexia on friday, and on saturday i am babysitting for mr. klak and his wife. it isn’t like i will have anything better to do. except watch cnn and see who wins that days caucusses.

phil(alexia’s b/f) is moving to california to live with cullin and andy. how crazy lucky is that? she said they are practically broken up anyway,which pleases me. but he is moving on the second of march, wow…that is just so close. i’m just glad that alexia won;t have to leave parties to get phil and she won;t have to spend time with phil working things out, stupid shit like that.

i am going to go now. i want to look some phone numbers up.

i will be back later.

sarah