Vengeance

I have been of late writing a million little prose passages dealing with assorted things, emotions ranging from sadness, love, romance, philosophy, friendship, anger, and various other things….if you want to hear some leave some notes on what topic you’d like to hear about…I’ve got a lot and I’ll write some based on your notes too….on what you want to hear I mean…but I wrote this interesting passage down and decided, I’ll put it on here since I haven’t put much of my writings on here as of late……

Listen to me and listen well because if you don’t I may look meager and barely able to handle myself in a fight, but you’d be very surprised how much raw power is in 18 years of pent up anger at a world where terrible people like you move around freely while people like me, who try to be decent, are punished for every little mistake because they’re percieved as weak. It’s unfathomable. Not because you’ve never experienced it, but because it is exactly like trying to comprehend not existing at all, it is imposssible. Why? Because most people who try to be decent ARE decent people deep down inside and therefore eventually destroy themselves because they believe they are at fault. I am an oxymoron in nature, I am an evil man who is trying to be good out of some unknown emotion that sways my mind and heart. And when the bomb of rage goes off in me, it will not implode like a manic depressive’s or a suicidal’s does, but rather explode in a messy, messy way. And even then, my explosion is unfathomable because it is not like an angry man’s explosion, for he vents often and his angry fits are sporadic and ineffective. Like a bomb, an angry man explodes and does massive damage, but the unintended damage is so great the blast seems to be a waste. No, I shall not explode outwards and decimate innocents or others, my explosion has FOCUS….and my focus is you. Now that I have made my motives clear, I don’t like you. That barely describes what I think of you. I’d use despise or loathe, but I’m unsure which is stronger, whichever is, that is the one I mean. You stand around using women and gloating as if they are trophies, when in fact you’ve neither won them over nor intend to. I’m not sure what part of your brain has gone soft and spoiled but whichever part it was I think you should really have replaced. You jump from idle fancy to idle fancy believing by the fact that they agree to see you ONCE means that they are madly in love with you. Charity, my friend, that is what you’re experiencing, not someone’s infatuation. And so you come to me and speak about my problems and mock me with your shallow and ignorant words and discuss love as if you even knew what it was. Even a man as miserably lost in heart knows more about love then you, a self proclaimed Romeo. It is this one fact that I just mention that distinctly makes you so ignorant, for no man names himself a winner of hearts, it is for others to name him. And yet I can see that even at this juncture you will wander from this room and shake off this entire matter as if you somehow intimidated me out of breaking you. I am not afraid of you. Perhaps you’ll believe that some sort of pity for you has spared you, though you will believe that any pity or empathy on my part is undeserving since you are far better off than I. I DO pity you. But that is not what spared me from breaking you in mind and body. I pity you because I CANNOT break you, because you’re already broken, and you won’t ever hear it….how does a computer alert itself of a virus if the virus attacks the alerting mechanism?

Now get out of here….and don’t EVER come here again.

A very angry thing don’t you think?