Sexual Complications

Hello again readers. I actually have several entries I want to write, and I think I’ll end each with a little poem related to the subject at hand. Kind of a prosaic/poetic metamorphosis essay that discusses ideals…haha….there goes my pretentious English major talking again.

Topic #1: The Concepts and Philosophies of a Brad Dealing with Sex.

Sex has always, to me, been thought of as a really awesome thing. The kind of moment that two people can share as they move closer to one another and share a moment of bliss. Love does not necessarily have to enter the equation, though for me, every single person I would have sex with I love in a very deep way. Of course most won’t understand this, because most think the kind of love I hold for many a person can only afford to give to one. I am not so……whatever the best word for that kind of person is.

Instead I believe that my love can span a great many people. For while some will dump me, that won’t mean that they have changed, only their desired mate….and if that changes love, than you really only loved them because they loved you…and that is a worthless and stupid type of love. And if love was something that changed when you dumped someone, then the only reason you loved them was because they were with you…..or that you had the chance to love them….and that is not good enough either for me. There are those I will never have and that does not mean I do not love them just as strongly as I love the ones I can. And if you love someone until you get to know them better, than you only loved them for their looks. There are too many times that one or all of these occur in the world and yet nobody thinks that the definition of love that humanity has given is wrong.

It’s wrong.

Anyway, I digress. Sex does not have to be with the person you love and want to spend the rest of your life with. Both parties should understand the terms under which the relationship and the sex are occurring in and both must consent. And while sometimes people expect a relationship to maybe further itself than the stated bounds, we won’t say that sex is out of the equation because one or the other is dreaming and not keeping themselves grounded in a reality.

The problem, for me, however, is that I don’t like sex now that I’ve had some of it. There are too many hurdles, too little satisfaction, and too many awkward problems.

Foreplay is wonderful. Now anyone with a weak stomach and not wanting great details about me might want to skip this paragraph. Anyway, the fact is that I have talent only with kissing and with my hands….oral is not my forte…I have a small tongue…..(see, I told you to look away…but NOoooooo.)

Anyway, I take what I can get with foreplay and everything, but sex overall is not that great for me. Condoms suck major ass….and the size of them is not adequate enough to fit around my….well, where else do you put a condom? Don’t answer that you sicko. Anyway, condoms suck big time. The pill or various other contraceptives I have no idea about, and usually you still have to wear a condom. So that’s big problemo with sex #1.

The second one is that for the guy, it’s an easy thing to lose it and climax…it takes talent to hold it in unless of course you have enough bad-foreplay before hand to make your talliwacker numb, and then you have the luxury of plugging away until the feeling comes back into your sorry little mister. This is a really odd entry, but I just need to vent some interesting things. Let’s also say that women’s orgasms are about as subtle as a gentle summer breeze for the most part, because their vocalization skills are in the nil department. Meanwhile a guy’s dick goes to shrinkwrapped sausage two seconds afer lift-off and so there’s really not much one can do from there.

So that leaves me with guilt. I hate sex. It makes me feel awful. The moment is wonderful and then it’s spoiled with a half-an-hour session of trying to fit the fucking condom on and then another five minutes of plugging away before I can’t stop the oil from bursting even if I cut off circulation to everything below my neck. And then the girl smiles and says its ok and you’re like…’yeah.’ And you lay down and stare at the ceiling and try to figure out how to not do what you just did the next time and it never works. But foreplay is great, but once more, the girl climaxing is almost non-existent and it takes some coaxing for a guy quite often and then the mess is kind of yucky.

So that’s sexual complications for you. I hope you haven’t lost your dinner, lunch, breakfast, or midnight snack when you read this. I’ve got another entry coming up in two seconds.

~~And I want to love you

In a way no man ever has or will,

Just to hold you and kiss you

Without a single thought of ill,

No personal pleasure do I seek for myself,

Only your smile shining towards my eye,

And with that I think I can laugh and die.

And when God asks me what I have done

To make me think the Gates should part,

I shall say that I loved you,

And he will see straight into my glowing heart,

And the gates shall tumble open

And the walls shall fall away,

The clouds will dissipate

And reveal the sun’s brilliant rays,

And He will say: “I shall try to make a world for you

As great as the one you have left,

With the beauty that you saw in her

And the love that pierced your every motion,”

Thus he shall reach out his mammoth hand,

And with a whisper say: “I’m not sure I can.”~~