Devastated
I feel sick….maybe it’s lack of sleep.
Right now I’m crippled. The pain is unbearable. I feel nauseous. I’m shaking. I don’t know where I went wrong and I want to make it right but I can’t it seems. The decisions are all out of my hands. I try to say things and none of them are taken correctly, I try to do them and they go all wrong. I want to say everything on my mind but everything I say is just destroyed…it’s all pointless. At least..to them.
I thought I was striking out and so I said it…cuz I had to. I fight. Im not going quietly into the night because I have trust issues too god damn it. And I’m not a liar. I have lied. But I didnt lie about everything…fucking….
There is no point to me or this anymore. I will never stop loving her. I can’t take anymore…I have to get out of here…