Chapter XXXVIII: Shadows (Cont. V)
“It’s not your decision!”
“It is MY decision! You think life is all in your hands! That it’s you who controls every move. Well sometimes you have no control! Sometimes all your dreams and your very life are put in the hands of other people. Like all the planes are putting their hopes and lives into MY hands! MINE! And you are among them, so I will not see you follow me and I will not see you get killed! Go back home, Deira. Take Tuzel and live a happy life! Mine is meant to go through that portal and find the thirteenth watcher and, if necessary, die stopping him.”
Deira turned and hugged Samden to her, “I won’t let you go!” For the first time in years, Deira cried. She sobbed her heart out, letting the pain and anguish roll from her as she clung to him. Her hands locked behind his back and she squeezed as if letting go would kill her. Samden tried to push away, but then stopped fighting, letting her sob on his shoulder. He didn’t know what to say or how to get her off of him, so he just let her cling to him. He let her pour her emotions into screams and sobs. Finally, it died and he pulled her away, kissing her on the lips for a moment, then pulling away.
“This is it for me. Go home with Tuzel. Love him….he needs it and I know you feel for him, too. I can’t be with you, but I promise that I won’t die….I will live on so that you never have to worry. I will live on to fight the evil that roams the planes and keep your children and your grandchildren safe. That’s my destiny, and I do want it. This isn’t just my father, this isn’t just my mother, this is me, too. And when I die, I promise to always watch over you and your descendants. That’s all I can promise you. There is no love for me and I accept that and want it. Do you understand me?” Deira nodded solemnly as Samden brought his finger up and wiped the tears away from her cheek.
“I’m going to hold you to it. You know I’ll know if you’re not there.” She tried to smile.
“I know.” Samden smiled. “Duty, Deira. That was what we were born to follow. Not our hearts.”
She watched him turn and march towards the temple and then disappear into the darkness. She heard the ripple of the pool as he disappeared through, standing silently in the snow, not wishing to tell him that he was wrong. She turned to see Tuzel standing by her. For the first time in her life, as far as she could remember at least, he looked sorrowful. “Are you all right, Tuzel?”
“I’ll miss him. I missed him all this time. I only ever wanted to be like him.”
“Me, too, Tuzel.”
Tuzel looked down at his scars, “But I’m nothing like him. He doesn’t see it. He doesn’t see that when he fights he comes out like before and everytime I enter battle I’m changed.”
“We all have our callings.” The words stung her, but she didn’t show it.
“I’m sorry, Deira. I know you loved him. I wonder if we ever get what we want in life.”
“Probably not what we wanted in the first place, but maybe by the end, we realize that what we get is just as good.” She smiled and put her arm on Tuzel’s shoulder, the two marching back down the mountainside.
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Samden brought his sword around and took the head off the shadow that was materializing behind him. He marched with new determination towards the group who had now gathered. He glanced over at the Jaigons who were gathering in number again. “And they are?”
Blackheart turned around and smiled, “Our protection.”
Samden glanced over at the fading shadow creatures that had already been killed, “They don’t look that hard.” The Jaigons stood aside to reveal the exit to the temple. The land spanned out, a grey wasteland that spanned all the way to the horizon. On that horizon line, a large mass of black shapes were rushing forward towards the temple. Samden swallowed, “Oh.”
“To make matters worse,” West began smoking, “Our destination is on the other side of em.”
Adelia stood at the front of the entire group, drawing her sword out and raising it, “Then let’s get moving.” She brought her sword down with a yell, the Jaigons screaming and charging out into the wastes, blowing horns to summon more. The nine stood for a moment, preparing themselves for the battle ahead. After a moment, they too charged off into the wastes.
Samden clutched at his sword as his feet crashed across the grey rock, shattering the dusty pebbles as he moved through an air that seemed thicker than usual. He glanced over at the others who were all charging without expression, save West, who had a look of glee on his face. Another battle. It seemed that this was all they ever did anymore: fight. Each time they seemed to be getting better, but so were their enemies. He didn’t want to forget that they were also getting, despite all logic, more numerous. He shook off his thoughts, another routine step before battle. And then, the shadows were upon them.
Samden felt the sting as a claw caught his arm, though it did not break the chain mail. He ducked the second swing and brought his sword around, burying it chest deep in the creature, watching it shimmer for a moment and stumble away, the wound healing up. Samden didn’t even hesitate, swinging and taking the head off the creature. It fell away, trying to regenerate as more shadows surrounded him. A moment later, they were upon him, forcing him to the ground. He brought his sword up with a broad swing, taking out two of the shadows, but there were far too many. “Help!”