inconcievable
what do you do when something so horrible happens that it fully changes your perspective on someone?
i recently had some, to put it mildly, VERY bad news about a good friend. something so unexpected that its inconcievable to me.
i cant even think of anything to say to his wife and we’ve been friends for many years. i find myself avoiding contact with her. its wrong i know because its not her fault or her doing. but i dont know what to say and i dont want to say the wrong thing and hurt her further.
although im sure my silence hurts as well. i just cant wrap my brain around what has happened.
i cant even bring myself to say it. ive told 1 person what happened and still even after saying it out loud and knowing its happeneing and knowing the repercussions will continue to affect everyone in his life… still i just really cant believe this.
this man ive known for so long. it turns out i havent really known at all. and his wife OMG what a shock
i need to talk to her. but i just cant.
okay, i think i know how you can handle this, cause you’re going to have to talk to her sooner or later and the sooner you break the ice the better. you can pull her aside and look into her eyes and say “i’ve heard about what has happened and i just wanted you to know that i’m really sorry. please let me know if there is anything i can do, okay?” she probably won’t know what to say so don’t expecther to say anything. give her a little hug or rub her arm or something. and then if it’s appropriate you can walk away, just say gently “i’ll see you later, okay?” that’s all. you don’t have to have a long conversation with her, she may not be able to talk about it. but just acknowledging that you know shows her some respect, because she must know that you and a lot of other people know. and you’ve broken the ice. next time you don’t even have to mention it, just squeeze her arm or something and let her bring it up if she wants to. and let life go on…
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