arent you sorry?
at those words not only did i do a mental double take i did a physical one as well, even though i was on the phone at the time.
B called. obviously
he wanted to talk about what went wrong with our marriage. really what he wanted to talk about was what he thought went wrong with it.
too little too late i think but oh well. so he discussed and i said as few words as possible makeing mostly non commital noises. ive gotten good at those over the years i wasnt really listening anymore when he asked. i was throwing coppers hedgehog for him and trying to keep hunter out of the trash can. so of course i made the mistake of saying.. what? when he repeated himself is when i did the double take.
sorry for what? .. sorry for breaking up our marriage!! to which i just closed my eyes and prayed for patience NOW!
im sorry for a lot of things.
im sorry your such an enormous ass
im sorry you dont see how horribly you neglect your son
im sorry that it took me so damn long to see
im sorry that lilman is the one thats been hurt most from this
im sorry i stayed for so long under your thumb
i could go on with my list of things im sorry for. but nowhere on that list will you ever see
im sorry for realising my own self worth and finally taking control of my own happiness.
youll never see me say that. so am i sorry? yes yes i am. am i sorry for you? not a chance
so for the last time i had that conversation with B. i layed it all out for him. told him from begining to end where we went wrong and why and how. and yes i say we. i dont lay all the blame on him. yes his infidelity was the final straw but by no means was it the only one. it takes 2 to tango after all and we stopped doing the tango a long time ago.
so i think hes gotten my point now. he needs to go back to his new wife and either make things work or get the hell out before he goes another 10 years makeing someone else misserable.
but its not my life anymore thankfully and i can close that door and not even wonder whats going on behind it
it feels good.
The new wife may want to consider counting how many straws she has and how many left.
Warning Comment
You have no idea how happy it makes me to see you “know” what’s right (who am I kidding or course you do). It’s one thing to think that something is right and another to feel something is right. But to KNOW it’s right is a wonderful thing. Congrats on reaching this point. On knowing so much more now than you did a few short years ago. I can only hope I reach the same point some day. *m*H*S*
Warning Comment
ryn; The six on the end. I forgot to add things like, The Heart is a lonely Hunter, Carson McCullers or The Big Sleep, Raymond Chandler or A childs Christmas in Wales, Dylan Thomas.
Warning Comment