Bah Humbug!

Yeah, I know it’s a Xmas phrase, but I despise Valentine’s Day. I can’t ever remember having a good one. And of course, this year is no different. But what’s all the fuss about anyways? Shouldn’t you show your love for someone everyday? I always did… but I always got sh<c>it on too. So I guess it doesn’t matter.

My best friend isn’t talking to me. A few weeks ago I went to see her after having a bad day. I thought I could relax a little, we could have a good time, maybe I could vent. But her stupid ass boyfriend doesn’t know when to shut up. So I gave her a hug and said I’d talk to her later. I left in tears.  Haven’t heard from her since then. I’ve been reluctant to call because I don’t want to start anymore shit between the two of them. So I’ll just let it rest. Not the first friend I’ve lost.

This is why I try not to make strong bonds with anyone anymore. I just get sh<c>it on in the end.

However, my best friend from middle school called me about a week ago. Out of the blue. I hadn’t talked to her in something like 6 years. Probably the last person I had ever expected to hear from ever again. I was completely stunned when I answered the hpone. We’ve talked a few times since then also. (Cell phones with free long distance are great!) She’s doing really well, and I’m happy for her. She was always one of the ones I worried about. But she’s doing better than I am. Maybe I should have been worrying about myself?

I’m seriously contemplating getting a second job. I need to move out of this place. I adore my family, don’t get me wrong. But they’re driving me absolutely batty! I have NO privacy, I can’t make any plans to do anything because one of them may call me to ruin them. It sucks. I can’t just tell them to bug off, I have shit to do. After all, they do let me live here and they don’t have to do that. So I have to be nice. But it’s getting old, real old. And I don’t know how much longer I can take it.

That’s about all for now. Ciao!