*Looks Around*….Waits On Something To Happen

Well…it was a pretty uneventful weekend….

Friday we didn’t do much, went to the store and all that fun crap…whoo…then just lazed around after I fixed dinner….Saturday I had to work which sucked complete ass….my boss was in a bitchy/mean/hyper/ mood, which was really nice for me right?  She all came in and it was on…I was trying to get everything ready for the Saturday rush and in the middle of it she asked me to take the trash out, which I don’t have a problem doing except she was supposed to do it on Thursday night because she worked the 2-10 shift, but I’m not surprised she never does it….

So I did and life went on…she just kept complaining about stuff and I just let her…not saying a word….then I was putting in some tickets in the computer minding my own business and she asked me if I had done the request on/off forms on Friday and I said no I didn’t….then she replied to me…."Well, not to be rude or anything but what did you do yesterday"…in a really crappy tone…now this is the comment that sent me into a mild pissed off fest….What did I do???? Excuse me but aren’t you the bitch that comes to work and watches everyone else work and just moves papers from place to place on the desk???  After the comment she walked away for awhile and I just kept putting in tickets not saying a word to anyone…until one of the instructors walked by and asked if I was alright and I said yes, but she didn’t believe it and said she could see it on my face to which I replied…I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!….(I apologized to her later)….after that my boss came walking back up and was bitching about something else…I said I had to go to the restroom and promptly went there starting crying because I was so pissed….Wiped away the tears, looked in the mirror and told myself that I was alright and to suck it up….

So I did just that…I took all the bitching that day…with a smile for the rest of the day….and at the end of it she said to me…"Thanks for getting all that stuff done today…that was great I know we don’t usually have time on Saturday’s to do that so thanks"….Didn’t really mean much to me…what was I supposed to say back????  Thanks for bitching at me the entire day and making this Saturday a really pissy one for me???….So, Saturday…not such a good day for me….

That night though wasn’t too bad, came home, ordered Chinese, watched some movies and went to bed at 9:30…it was weird…didn’t get up until 9:00…that’s alot of sleep for me…guess I needed it …..so Sunday was good….my husband was in a pretty good mood and I got alot done…lets see I did him, the fish tank, and the dishes…very productive…lol….

I’m glad I got today off though….it’s nice to have a little alone time just to relax and not worry about so much stuff….i.e. the car, moving, reviews coming up this week at work…that sort of stuff….sometimes I feel really overwhelmed and just not so perky….like I could and would just lay down and sleep for about three days….anyone else feel like that sometimes???  I always fear that my depressing days will get the best of me sometimes….I guess that sometimes I am just scared that everything is going to crumble around me and I’ll just be left standing there in the middle of it all with nothing to do but cry and no one to grab onto when life just gets too much to cope with….

Today I feel……unsure of myself…..

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