=[

So Im just a little embarssed. About the whole no condom thing. I got some pretty intense comments, private and not, about it.

I dont really pay much attention to the comments I get on here… but these really struck a chord with me. I almost feel like I need to apologize.

Im not a dumb a girl. Im really not. My best friend has a baby, I see her struggle everyday and saw her fun teenage years go down the drain. I know the consequences of unprotected sex. Even Vanessa had one too many scares and shes only 16! It was a stupid mistake. But everything turned out okay. And I know, it was just one time… yes I know it could happen the first time or the 45th time. I know. Im just… embarssed.

My mom is really chill about things like that. She knows Im growing up. And I wanna tell her about William. She’s already told me before she will buy me condoms and even get me brith control. And at that time, I told her no thank you because I wasnt having sex with anyone. But I guess things have changed. I dunno. I really wanna tell her but how the hell do I bring that up in a convo? "Oh btw mom, me and William decided to start fooling around. Buy me some condoms, kaythanxbyeeee!"

No.

And.. maybe this is TMI but a lot of the time me and Will did anal. Which is gross and not all puppies and rainbows but whatever. I actually only think he penetrated me like.. 2 or 3 times in my vagina. But thats no excuse and Im not trying to justify what I did (or didnt do).

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anyways,

Me, Britanie and Carlos went out to the Castle last night. Drove 100 miles one way to go to a club. It was fricking amazing. We had an awesome time. And a Michael Jackson song came on so I just haddddd to jump up on the blocks and dance to it. I got a little watcher. It was fun. My drunk ass jumped down and started dancing with him and he was whipsering in me ear "I love watching you dance". And sure enough I asked him for a kiss. So I stole a couple of kisses from him. Totally didnt know him or how old he was or anything about it. But whatever. Its all fun. Then we left at 3:15 and got home at 5 in the morning. I was planning on sleeping in till 1:30 and then just getting ready for work and leaving for work at 3. But me and Brit ended up waking up at 9:30! And then we went out to Panera for breakfast and now I sitting here a Starbucks with her writing this. And that was my Monday night/Tuesday morning.

I work tonight till 10. Gay.

Tomorrow me and Brit and the baby are going to the beach! Im excited. Then at.. 8? I think? Im babysitting Jackson and Griffin again. So thats fun. And gas money because Brit filled up my tank and driving 200 miles in a night ate all that gas. So I barely have any.

Toodles.