Listeners

I was thinking about the tutorial period I lead yesterday. I went to Ollie’s mum’s year 7 form and spoke for about 35 – 40 minutes about our Listeners scheme, trying to show year 7s that talking to someone about your problems isn’t ‘sad’. A task that was proven to be much easier than we thought it would be. Especially as we had a couple of girls in the form who had been to listeners before. We didn’t single them out or anything but one shoved her hand up and said "well when I was talking to my listener she…blah blah blah" and i was like woo go little girl! She did go a little shy and you could tell she had been debating whether she should say anything or not but..it was good. And another girl had a quiet word with me coz she was sitting at the front of the class I was talking to when we set them on a little paired listening activity. (don’t we sound like we were proper teachers) (actually..don’t I. It was meant to be me and Rach S. But she went all shy so it was me with my almost lost voice trying to teach a bunch of year 7s. Ol’s mum only had to rescue us once and all that took was a "Come on guys..")

Anyway, thats not what I was saying. I was thinking about it and..how fucking hypocritical am i?? I’m saying to these kids..talk to people about your problems. No matter how little you think it is, if it’s getting to you, it’s always worth having someone there that you can talk to. Talk to your friends, talk to your teachers and talk to us. Teachers and listeners will promise to keep everything confidential unless it is something we are legally required to pass on, and even then we will ask your permission about how and when we pass it on. I’m saying, your friends want to be there for you. I’m saying everyone is cared about by someone and everyone has an opportunity to talk to someone, so take it. I’m saying all this but really, it’s bullshit isnt it? Who the fuck do I talk to? The internet. Henry on the internet. My diary on the internet. I never *say* anything. I don’t ever say my problems out loud. Not to anyone, especially not some fucking trendy girl 4 or 5 years older than me thats had a few nights training by the Samaritans and reckons she can help you sort things. Not some girl who’s probably more fucked up than I am. It’s all bullshit isnt it?