okay, now what

 my reference gig came to an end this past friday.  after 2 1/2 years i am done.  i’m not mad, i’m disappointed.  budget cuts, so they say, is the reason why my position was defunded.  i always knew it was tenuous, it was "soft money" that kept me employed, meaning it was left of money.  i went back and reread entries i wrote when i first started the position and at first they were very positive, but it ddn’t take long for the tone to change.  i think i am actually kind of relieved that i’m no long on the refdesk.  i like the job, but it didn’t do much for me, that is the first year i learned a lot, got comfortable with reference work and discovered i enjoyed it, but the second year or so i noticed a distinct plateauing.  my skills weren’t necessarily increased, but just kept using them over and over again.  new experiences were far and few between.  in short, i became a glorified GA, who made a librarian’s salary.  i am going to miss that money, by the way.  that was a pretty good hourly rate.  

i’ll still be in the library, at least for a little while longer.  i’m still in the archives.  i like it, its interesting, but i don’t think it is something i could do for ever as a career.  mainly because there is little interaction with people.  i interact with coworkers, but they are all very quiet.  it takes a lot to draw them out.  i can go for hours with out having a conversation.  

i still work at the bookstore, but that’s just weekends.  and i’ve become the guy who peddles the e-reader.  i stand up front, greet customers and try engage them in conversation about it.  i enjoy doing it, but standing in one spot for hours on end can and does start to hurt pretty quickly.

so, what am i going to do now?  good question.  i am going to beat pavement, go to temp agencies.  i need to do something, i hope i can get a job that will allow my resume to grow more.  add more experience so that i can parlay that into a career.  a real career.  i’m 37 years old and i feel clueless. everyplace i go to says the same thing; ‘go online and apply there" i do that and never hear anything.  its the most frustrating thing ever.  i guess there is no such thing as HR departments anymore.  this is an example of the bad that the internet has done.  more and more i’m thinking the internet has done more harm than good, but that’s another thesis for another time, maybe.