the fisher king’s lament

I’m sorry
that I keep apologizing for everything
I’m sorry

I’m sorry for acting like everything’s my fault
because of something terrible I did
because of something wonderful I never got around to
I’m sorry

I’m sorry that acting like everything’s my fault
is just the coin’s flipside of egotism
it’s still self-centered
it still gives me all the power
it still makes me the sun
and all the rest around me is a satellite
it’s just that I’m a shitty center of the universe
it’s the same as being an arrogant asshole
except in the other direction
and I’m sorry for it

I’m sorry that I keep
talking about all of my regrets
how the things you did but shouldn’t have
those are regrets with a lower-case r
but how the things you didn’t do and should have
those are regrets with the r in full caps
I’m sorry for that
I’m sorry
I’M SORRY!

I’m sorry apologizing doesn’t change the past
I’m sorry apologizing doesn’t change the present
I’m sorry that apologizing even doesn’t change the future
unless you work really hard to follow through
which I sometimes don’t
so I’m sorry for that too
I’m sorry for me
I’m sorry for you
I’m sorry

I’m sorry
that I keep apologizing
for everything all of the time
like I’m trying to break a record
for trying to sound like a broken record

I’m sorry
that I keep apologizing
for everything all of the time
like I’m trying to break a record
for trying to sound like a broken record

I’m sorry
that I keep apologizing
for everything all of the time
like I’m trying to break a record
for trying to sound like a broken record
and I’m sorry that I repeat myself
when under stress
when under stress
when under stress
I’m sorry

I really am