Single dog home

Its been an emotional few days. I usually work from home on Thursdays now, so it was a blessing to be able to do that last week, but I also stayed home on Friday because I just felt that I wouldn’t be able to hold it together all day. I’m working from home today as scheduled.

We miss Amos terribly. The house is just not the same without him and coming home is so quiet now. He had this way of welcoming us home… making this "ahhrrroooo" noise. It was adorable and funny and just so awesome to be welcomed home that way. Rosie is so different. So quiet. She still thumps her tail when she sees us, but she doesn’t get crazy wound up the way she would when she saw how excited Amos was that we were home.

I feel a lot more at peace this time around as opposed to when we lost Buster. I don’t know if its because I was part of the decision this time or if it was because Amos was so CLEARLY in distress and it was obvious we were relieving him of his suffering. But, I am not as distraught and feeling an overall sense of depression like I was when we lost Buster. When Buster died, he broke his leg and then we found out he had bone cancer and Mich decided to let him go based on her past experiences. I think I was left feeling so lost and confused and feeling like we could have done more. With Amos, there was no question… the questions I had were why and how… but not questions of our own choices. I feel like we did the right thing. And he had an amazing life and a happy last weekend with us.

Its also really hard to be depressed with Rosie around. She is a truly joyful dog. She has been much quieter than usual, but overall, she is just so happy. And also, I really want to make sure she feels ok and happy. I’m worried about her… that she will feel lost without another dog in the house. She only got to learn from him for 6 months (on the dot) and we are hopeful it was enough. We were told when we adopted her that she needed another dog to help teach her. So, I’ve been trying to keep things upbeat with her. So far, we have seen some differences… she’s not wanting to go out so much… she’s a little more timid around the house… she is unsure about going back into the house… and getting in the car was a struggle at first. We got her to a play group yesterday with some Golden buddies. She was extremely happy and excited to be with other dogs again.

I said something about her future sibling (way in the future) to Mich… Mich surprised me by saying that she thinks she wants to be dog free in the future for a bit so that we can travel and stuff. I have never heard her say this before… in fact, I thought she said the exact opposite at one point. I think her heart is very very tender right now. She was very close with Amos and is still crying a lot.