12/05/2012

I guess I should write again.

I got stood up by the horse. LOL I don’t know what happened, but she never showed up. I gave her a list of what I have planned and she said she’ll just wing it.

I keep looking for jobs, but nothing new has piqued my interest. I worked for my PT gig yesterday and she only wants me to come for 4 hours next week. She said things will "quiet down" until January. I really need to stir up some energy to get another job. This isn’t cutting it for me.

I feel a little conflicted. Mich has been studying so so much and up until recently I have basically just been hanging out in the house when she is home studying. But on Saturday I went to a party without her. She’s coming up on finals and so she absolutely positively cannot do anything other than study right now. This weekend, our friends are getting together for dinner and games. Again I told her that I think I’m going to go without her. It makes me so sad, but I know its for the best. I can’t keep sitting around just because she has to be cooped up. Its almost over though… just two more weeks and then she’s off for a few weeks. However, the spring semester is supposed to be worse. Sigh.

She said something last night about the summer and being kinda conflicted also because she really wants to get back to mountain biking… but hates that its gotten to this point that we are now doing things without each other. I told her that she just can’t give up stuff she loves because I don’t want to do it. Mountain biking scares me and I have tried two or three times to do it with her, but crashing into trees and being completely pissed off with the whole experience wasn’t my idea of fun, so I will pass from now on. I told her that if I know she’s up to something, then at least I won’t feel bad doing something on my own, like taking a yoga class or teaching a workshop.

We just kinda sighed and I think realized that I guess for us… 4 years was the length of our "honeymoon" period… Real life sucks. LOL

But, we are still very much in love and very happy when we do have time together. I’m pretty much all smiles and laughs whenever I go anywhere and people always comment on how happy I am. The only thing I can think is that its because I do love my life so much…

So, these little sacrifices… less time with my honey, less money, etc…. must be worth it because I honestly don’t think I’ve ever been happier.