NoJoMo 7 – Loss of people so to speak

 I have been a wreck today…. I have felt for the past few days or so that something is off. Maybe its just a time of the year when people get hit with things hard. idk.

I went on Facebook today to wish a friend a technically belated birthday since I wasn’t on Facebook yesterday to wish her one.  But I noticed that she wasn’t a friend on there anymore. confused I emailed her on her gmail account (since her message option wasn’t available). 2 hrs ago I got her response to my email… and at work I just started to cry. I had to take a break and compose myself.

Over the past few years life has changed in many ways. . . I have been through ups and downs with various friends. Friends moving away, dealing with divorce, getting married, having kids, etc. While I am not perfect I do think that I am a good friend to people, and sometimes the friendships have become weak but rebuild again.  

I know Life happens, people change, life changes, people grow apart.  But Over the past few years I have slowly been losing all the friends that were close. (mostly due to miles, not due to the friendships fading away). My friends have had events in thier lives that have taken them places just away from Columbus. It doesn’t mean we aren’t friends.. its just hard when slowly the friend pool is getting less and less. Social Networking, Emails, Texting is the normal form of communication… I miss just being able to go to a friend and hang out and talk things out. 

But today Sarah gave me her reasons for defriending me… we have been friends for 22 years… We have fought and made up so many times. But outside of the friendship, she is like a sister.  I have not been really good at communicating with her this past year… and honestly I am not mad at all for her choice. I am just so heartbroken.

I lost an old flame to a loveless marriage, I lost close knit friendships to distances, and I am just losing grip today on things… today is just a really really really hard day.  

I understand that I have friends, I am a very personable person, and while distance isn’t going to tear apart friendships it simply just makes it a bit more difficult to easily maintain it… Its hard to lose someone from your life that you care about. 

I am just really down today… its not normal for me to feel… this down.. but its a rough day. It doesn’t help that I am feeling this way, and then on top of this, Stephen hasn’t been as chatty with me the past few days… so meh.. Idk… 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

My good Friend is back at it!! If you liked his previous story (I know I did!) El Ray Romero… then check out his Dead Man Walking!

To read his newest ongoing Zombie Story Dead Man Walking

To read his old Zombie Diary El Ray Romero told in first person style