another funny for you!

here you go guys enjoy!

Diet for stressed women!

This is a specially formulated diet designed to help WOMEN cope with the STRESS that builds during the day.

      8:00am  BREAKFAST
       * 1 Grapefruit
       * 1 slice whole-wheat toast without butter
       * 1 cup skimmed milk

      1:30pm  LUNCH
       * 1 small portion lean, steamed chicken with a cup of spinach
       * 1 cup herbal tea
       * 1 Penguin Biscuit

      2:00pm  AFTERNOON TEA
       * The rest of the bl**dy Penguins 
       * 1 tub of Haagen Dazs ice cream with chocolate topping

      7:30p  DINNER
       * 4 bottles of wine (red or white)
       * 2 loaves garlic bread
       * 1 family size Supreme pizza
       * 3 snickers bars

      10:30pm  LATE NIGHT SNACK
       * 1 whole cheesecake (eaten directly from the freezer if necessary)

REMEMBER:

     "Stressed" spelled backwards is desserts"

My life coach told me the way to achieve inner peace is to finish all the things you have started.

So I looked around my house to see things I’d started and hadn’t finished; and before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a  bottle of Chardonay, a bottle of Baileys, a butle of Kehuha, a pockage of Pinqeuns, tha rrmainder of bhotl Prozic and Valum scriptins, the res of the Chesescke, some saltins an a bax a cholates.

Yu haf no idr who gud I fel!

well well well im off to uni in only 11 days which is a bit freaky and im not packed! but taking friday off and going shopping with mother to buy all my stuff, woo hoo lets wait for the arguments to occur that day!!  upset at not being able to see everyone before we all go our ways again but hey ho!

xxxx