Good coffee

My coffee tastes so good this morning. It’s like a cigarette after sex.

Evidently Eric did NOT freak out when I said I was feeling something more than just a lot of like. I’m still trying to fully identify what that is myself. It’s complicated, that’s most of what I’ve decided. It’s mostly that it’s scary to even think the words, much less say them in the daylight.  Do I even know him enough to say that?  Even to myself?  Is it a case of super strong connection from the first time we met?  Is it just two people with a lot in common that are open to spending time together?  Hell if I know, I just know it’s a deeper, scarier feeling than I was prepared for

He’s so delicious.  And pretty!  And sweet, honest, and easy to be with.  Is it just that I’m in a mental/emotional place to look at long term and he’s just the one I happen to be with?  I don’t think that’s it.  In fact I know it’s not, it’s just one of those platitudes you throw out there in case it doesn’t work out

I’m sunk, I’m in deep, and for the first time in I don’t know how long.  I’m just trying to revel in the feel-good of it

Mmmm, this coffee tho!  Time for a fresh cup!