“You’re Going To Make Me A Very Rich Woman”

“Oh, is that why you keep me around?”

“Not in the least…”

Not in the least . . . I talked to Jason today. He came to my house and stood outside my window, whistling. I was so relieved to see him, I let him in and just hugged him when he was in the dining room. I got an answer to something that . . . I don’t even know how to describe it. I don’t want to describe it online. I want to write about it in my hand-written journal, and just keep it to myself . . . Dolly? I know that you’re going to read this, and I know you’re going to wonder what it’s about, but . . . I can’t tell you. It’s not my place to do such. I happened to stumble on it as it is, because, like so many other things, this just hit me. And I know I’m being cryptic and vague and I know you hate that, but . . . I just can’t say anything more. Not here, not in IM, not on the phone, not in a letter . . .

On another subject, Melanie IMed me, and we talked, and she said she had the perfect background for me. And, well, she’s right. It’s currently my border. It’s perfect for me, actually. How I feel right now. Because it’s smilies, which are happy, but they’re blue, and that usually represents a color of depression. And that combination is what I’m feeling now.

::Sighs:: I don’t know. I’ll be okay. Yeah, I’m hurt, but . . . oddly enough, I understand now. So I do thank Jason for that understanding. “What goes around, comes around . . .”